Magnum Opus

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2008-01-07T01:00:00.000-08:00

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One Knight Stands

Check out the new site for all my latest posts on Movies, Music, Pop Culture, Humor and much more.

Taare Zameen Par

2007-12-30T01:30:00.000-08:00

In everyway possible, Ishaan of Taare Zameen Par (TZP) miraculously brings the mirror in front of me and makes me look back with nostalgia at the fond memories and even at some of the childhood dilemmas that I faced, along with the utter peer pressure which we have always been subjected to, right from Day 1 of School.The untied shoe laces, the uncombed hair, the shirts with the buttons out, and the free spirit crying and trying to let free from the shackles of the “conformity” and social compatibility. But then, this is not a personal confession, but the movie review (but a bit personal in a way) of TZP.
What makes TZP work for me is the very personal message that it carries of how children are exploited by their own parents by measuring them on the criteria of percentages and treating them as marks churning bots. Creativity and Arts are hardly encouraged enough and children face the grind of preparing for the Rat Race. TZP weaves this extremely sensitive message, which could actually fall flat as a niche topic appealing only to a handful, with a beautiful story of Ishaan Awasthi, a child suffering from dyslexia but with the gift of imagination and grabbing it into his world of crayons and wet brushes. Needless to say, Papa Awasthi is not pleased by the failure of young Ishaan at academics, given that his elder brother is a school topper. TZP spans across the imaginative world of Ishaan and his continuous struggle with the straitjacket of conformity. Subsequently he emerges triumphant with the help of his Fine Arts teacher Ram Shankar Nikumbh( Aamir Khan), and it is this journey of triumph of the honest and innocent spirit of a child which keeps our eyes glued to the screen and moistened throughout.

The opening credits remind me of the numerous stop animation shorts that we have literally grown on, and yet in a very effective way, help us to explore the imaginative world of Ishaan. The Saturn hoola-hoops, the flight to Pluto and sea horses gallop, the flight of imagination has no bounds and to put them down to celluloid is a feat in itself.
Ishaan’s imaginative universe replete with bright hues and splashed shades stirs the soul and yet keeps it real without going overboard. As in, we do not get to see any Picasso or Da Vinci , but we get to see a child prodigy’s crayon works which look like a child’s. That’s how real it is. But then, TZP, being a commercial movie, has its elements of “Bollywood” in Aamir’s intro scene as the musical Patch Adams meets Pied Piper with a playback of Shaan on Bum Bum Bole. The kids are surprisingly too musically correct, which in my case isn’t too real. Because I know, my 5th standard class wasn’t at all, by any stretch of imagination. But then, complaining about that would be just plain nitpicking.

TZP’s real spirit comes alive with its music, and vice versa. Shankar Ehsaan Loy have given soul to the body of this celluloid piece and in my opinion, this is their best work since Dil Chahta Hai. With Vishal creating the aura of the very Rock “Duniya Ka Naaraa….Jamey Raho” we sense the mechanical nature of today’s materialistic world, where early morning routines of the typical working class and their children finds accurate definition. And as Shankar enters with a classical twist to it with “ Yahaa Alag Andaaz hai…” we see little Ishaan waking up in his own pace. Instant Reaction:-the 9 inch smile-

Ye Waqt Ke Kabhi Ghulam Nahi, Inhe Kisi Baat ka Dhyaan Nahi, Titlee se Milne Jaate Hai, Ye Pedho se Batiyate Hai

( He is not a slave to time, He doesn’t care about anything, He goes to meet the butterflies, He talks to the Trees). One of my favorite on the soundtrack is the imaginative Mera Jahaan with Adnan Sami and cute,childish yet perfectly pitched Auriel and Ananya who remind me of Connie Talbot singing Somewhere Over the Rainbow. The falsetto rendition of “All I need is to be …..Freeeee….” just gives me goose bumps everytime I listen to it. And then the very relaxed and dew fresh vocals of Adnan take over the acoustic guitars in the background as he murmurs” Sapno ka buna…Sweater..”. Young Ishaan explores the streets of Mumbai all alone and yet, the song sings “ Akela Nahi Main, Khuli Aankho se Neend main chalta, Girta zyada,Kam Sambhalta “( I am not alone, I am walking in my sleep with my eyes wide open, I fall often and I am very less careful).

The First ace of the soundtrack however is Maa. Shankar Mahadevan is aged 40 plus, yet he miraculously blends the sentiments of an 8 year old in his vocals, and surprisingly enough for me, I started believing that it’s Ishaan crying out “Main Kabhi Batlata Nahin
Par Andhere Se Darta Hoon Main Maa » ( I never say it, But oh mother,I am scared of the dark). Even the coldest heart would melt down and for me, it was time to change the handkerchief. The title track “ Taare Zameen Par” shows why Prasoon Joshi is taking home all the awards next year for Best Lyricist. Innocent thoughts unadulterated by the cunning thoughts of adulthood, is what can describe the sheer sincerity of the lyrics. Take this –

Jaise Aankhon Ki Dibiya Mein Nindiya
Aur Nindiya Mein Meetha Sa Sapna
Aur Sapne Mein Mil Jaaye Farishta Sa Koi

(Like Sleep in the Box of the eyes, And a Sweet Dream in the Sleep, And in that Sleep, finding an Angel).
And then we have Raman Mahadevan taking control of the offbeat guitar strokes with “Kholo Kholo”. This is where Indian Rock just made its presence stronger in Bollywood Music. I so much love it, and I can’t stop my air-drumming. Even Ishaan’s theme set to the Youtube-ish Home video footage of kid Ishaan made me tears trickle down. Okay, I admit that I am weepy. So what?

As far as the performances go, I believe Aamir Khan is winning the award for the Best Supporting Actor. Because Darsheel Safary as Ishaan Awasthi spells magic and gives life to this character to such an extent, that we do not for even a moment get to think that a piece of filmed material is being screened. All the pranks, all the frustration, the anger, the wicked smiles, the fears and the tears are all so real, and noticeably without the “extra sugar coated” boy image that Bollywood movies are populated with. Aamir Khan, the director, or Aamir Khan, the actor. BOTH. You really know how to tell your story and dude, you’ve just outdone yourself.Give him all the awards, all the honors, and Darsheel you deserve a trip to Disneyland for this. Now where’s my third handkerfchief?

American Gangster

2007-12-18T21:30:00.000-08:00

This is that Gangster Magnum Opus everyone’s talking about. And if you haven’t laid your eyes upon it, you better do it soon. All because there’s Denzel Washington playing heroine magnet, Frank Lucas and Russell Crowe as Detective Ritchie Roberts. And oh btw, Ridley Scott is pulling the strings. Need anymore reason? This goes straight to the Oscars nominations list and SHALL emerge triumphant. Having said that, I’d also like to add, that this is Mr. Scott’s earnest tribute to the crafty art of Gangster mafia movies which Hollywood completely digs. From the Coppola’s Corleones, to the Sopranos to Scorsese’s Goodfellas, “American Gangster” gives you that familiar taste of the gangster movie, but wait, it isn’t that simple. The taste is familiar but at the same time, so very IRRESISTABLY SEDUCTIVE and CRISPY. Some might just term it as Godfather with Black People. I can just pity those ignorant people and hope they get their conscience back.

For the uninitiated this is based on the 1970’s real-life account of kingpin Frank Lucas, who rose from the dark and dirty slums of North Carolina to undermine the cartels of New Jersey with a freakishly innovative way of trading heroine which he discovers while he was watching a news story about the high strength heroin laying out American servicemen in war-zone Vietnam. Lucas flies directly to Bangkok to make a direct deal with the drug makers, thus cutting out every possible middleman in the mafia clan and even guaranteeing a monopoly in the purest product –Blue Magic.

Meanwhile, troubled by a failed marriage and his honesty coming across as a career obstacle in a corrupt world, Detv.Ritchie Roberts emerges as the nemesis of Frank Lucas who is investigating on the emergence of a new market leader , BLUE MAGIC, and is amazed how someone can sell a product almost twice as pure as its nearest competitor at half the price. It takes a long time for the two to face each other, but as the scenes unfold, we experience an inexplicable symmetry between the two and their working minds. Both have absolute dissimilarities, but also have a clear idea of having things done their way.

The settings and the entire dark alley backdrop of 1970s New York just makes me spellbound and I couldn’t have asked for more. Of course, that is what you can expect from Ridley Scott, an ace ad-director of the 1970s era. Many would expect the NY backdrop demands the skyline shot and the skyscrapers. But this is a movie where the action is on the streets, where there are small coffee shops with green windows and clean glass panes. The winter is freezy , and so is the cold death shots that Lucas shoots on the streets. Of course, the immediate comparison with Godfather is inevitable, as Lucas moves his family from North Carolina to New Jersey, to help him run the business. The deaths are as cold blooded as you could expect, and there’s enough of unexpected and unwanted nudity onscreen surrounded with white powder and blue pouches. And for those who complain, there’s not enough Bam-Bam here for a gangster movie, wait till the climax mammoth confrontation.

The typical gangster movie would feature boring dialogues in perfect Italian accent and long silent stares with gleaming eyes. Of course, this is not the case here. The star power of Denzel Washington takes control of the screen as though he reigned it with only his smile and the simple uttering of the words “Mah Man”. It’s been a while now since Al Pacino’s “Scarface” happened. Russell Crowe on the other hand, is the rugged cop, who doesn’t have the power stare working. But yes, even his silliest jokes and nervous appearance makes you wonder, if he is the guy who played Maximus. It’s pure onscreen fire when you see these two collide, face to face. The powerhouse performance by the duo is just so convincing enough to make this a cracking of a movie, but at the end of the day, with no disrespect to the white Oscar Winner, this is Washington’s , through and through. Not only because it is called “American Gangster”, not American Cop, but because he can say “Blue Magic is a brand, like PEPSI” and he makes me believe so.
Not to be missed by people who love good cinema. Now stand up and APPLAUD. Spare me the ratings.

Khoya Khoya Chand

2007-12-08T11:39:00.000-08:00

O Re Paakhi…O Re Paakhi resonates in my ears and as I sit down to write the review of Sudhir Mishra’s Khoya Khoya Chand, all that flashes into my eyes is the wet paint of the film sets, the halogen flood lights, the larger than life posters, and the filled theatre screenings of 1950’s -1960’s Bollywood, build perfectly to the last inch. Khoya Khoya Chand is sincere, honest and almost perfect in technique but unfortunately what starts off as story telling ends up being a history lesson. It is so much like a long lecture which started as being interesting and colorful, until the colors became repetitive and started blinding my eye. Of course, I’d stand up and applaud the technicians of the movie again and again throughout this review for making it almost feel like being seated in a Time Machine and getting deported to an era of the pot-bellied Producer getting bullied by the Superstars, the sleazy divas, the “favourable” Superstar, the struggling writer, the non-compliant industry-outsider director, the run of the mill dialogues and screenplay and the mom accompanied struggling wannabe. All of this and much more is taken care of perfectly and this is no small feat. What OSO (the other tribute to Bollywood movie, yeah the more commercial one) tried to attempt, Khoya Khoya Chand has achieved all of that and much more and it effortlessly makes us believe in Sudhir Mishra’s vision of the Black and White era of Indian Cinema.

Having said that definitely doesn’t necessarily mean that Khoya Khoya Chand is a gem of a film. Though it is accompanied by really strong performances by the main cast as well the supporting members, it fails on many accounts. The story narrates the story of a struggling actress, Nikhat (Soha Ali), who is awestruck by the glam and glitz of cinema. She willingly submits to the reigning superstar Prem Kumar (Rajet Kapoor) in return of her favours. Soon enough , she starts climbing up the ladders of success, until she realizes that she has been used when Prem announces his marriage. Nikhat finds solace in the arms of the aspiring writer, Zaffar(Shiney Ahuja). Zaffar reminds me of the villain of the same name in Disney’s Aladdin, yeah but he did not have any relationship issues, neither did he have any ego clashes. This Zaffar had all of them, including a troubled childhood resulting from a polygamist father and 3 stepmoms. The relationship between Zaffar and Nikhat goes through enough trying times, strenuous enough to make your head ache and force you to scream out “Stop you lady, and you, yes You Mr. Shut Up and listen to her for a sec”.The relationship itself is so confusing at times, and Nikhat as a person just leaves me gasping for more explanation. But then, Zaffar’s comeback and Nikhat’s sudden appreciation of him makes us feel that yeah, probably, the director has finally realized, “Okay , that’s enough indulgence for one film, its now time for a good climax “.
That’s when the climax song Thirak Thirak features in and the entire set, including the producer and the strict manager crack up, over a silly Ghungroo joke. WTF, I smiled out for no reason.

Shantanu Moitra scores an ace yet again with the soundtrack, and lemme tell you honesty, there are no mediocre tracks here. Just one ace after an ace, of course the Ace of Spades is O Re Paakhi by Sonu Nigam. Given the era of cinema depicted here, the soundtrack has an amazing jazz and blues element in it. Take for instance, the first track Ye Nigahein or the cabaret Khusboo Sa . Both are so very blues, so very intoxicating and both depict the smokes and mirrors of cinema effectively. The title track Khoya Khoya Chand features lyricist Swanand Kirkire rhyming lines to the backdrop of a 60’s rock n roll bass-line which ultimately finds climax in a beautiful qawwali. Shreya Ghosal is the next Alka Yagnik to say the least. I don’t need to say more, just close your eyes to Chale Aao and you’ll know what I’m talking about.

Talking about the performances, I’ll begin with Saurav Shukla who actually ends up being the most memorable character in the entire movie. Perfect Punjabi flavored producer with the best of the lines. Sushmita Chatterjee appears in just a couple of scenes but makes her presence felt. Vinay Pathak as the narrator, and the strict manager of Nikhat is a complete waste of his potential. He could have done so much more, but has ended being just a sidekick in this movie, almost reminds me of his Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam days. Rajet Kapoor commands the screen with his “haraami” portrayal of superstar Prem Kumar. Sonya Jehan as the yesteryears’ diva is one of the highest points of the movie. She effortlessly makes you remind of Meena Kumari ,Madhubala, and Nadira. Shiney Ahuja must have taken his urdu lessons way too seriously and it starts to irritate a bit when it gets overboard. But it helps coz he is supposed to be from Lucknow. Nevertheless, he certainly delivers a wonderful performance as the grief stricken Zaffar searching for his eternal and internal peace. There is so much credibility in his tears and his anguish , how could Nikhat resist that? This is by far Soha Ali’s best performance as Nikhat, the ACTRESS which takes us down memory lane through the pages of Filmfare 1960’s . The pages flashing stories of the actress’ rise, romance, gossips, fall from glory and eventually finding retreat in alcohol. Soha plays the character with intense credibility, thanks to the costumes, the make up and hair stylist to have made it possible. Worth mentioning is the scene when she enters the bedroom of Zaffar while he is sleeping. She is so much like Sharmila Tagore . But yes, the best performance is by the cinematographer Sachin Krishnan who blends the perfect hues with the best of settings. Absolutely impeccable. Only if Mr.Sudhir Mishra could have woken from his indulgence a bit early in the second half, Khoya Khoya Chand could have resulted in being a memorable piece of cinema, which it has failed to be.
2 on 5. Top notch music though. I am still humming O Re Paakhi.

Aaja Nachle

2007-12-01T01:03:00.000-08:00

This is not one of those posts which should be considered to be written by yet another fanboy. Rather this is a devotee writing about his Goddess. Madhuri or Madz as she would like her to be called (I guess), mother of two, aged 40, but still sizzles in her truest form. And I do not care if all those critics fail to recognize it. Probably they should get their lenses checked, or perhaps change their retinas. But that is one thing and we are here to talk about Aaja Nachle,the movie by ace cinematographer Anil Mehta. We have seen Mr. Mehta’s works as a cinematographer in many Yashraj flicks and he has captured some of the most breathtaking scenes on the Indian 70 mm. Be it the utterly urban Manhattan of Kal Ho Na Ho, or the rustic rural Bhuj as Lagaan’s Champaner, or the picturesque Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, Mr. Mehta’s artwork needs no introduction. Having said that, Aaja Nach Le ,is also spell bounding as far as the visuals are considered. But here lies the problem. It is too unreal. Of course, what else can we expect from a story by Aditya Chopra which just too fits the Yashraj run-of-the-mill mould.So you say, that well, movies are meant to be unreal, portraying a make-believe world so to say. But then, why did it take off on the real note?The problem is that we have to assume so many things that you lose count. I started doing it just for Madhuri(but of course), but I ended up getting tired. So I said to myself, well, screw it, let’s just enjoy this as a mindless dance joyride, and I started to enjoy it more after that.

For all those curious ones, the story is about a rebellious Dancer (shockingly!) called Diya who leaves her hometown Shamli when she is forced to get married and flies off to NY and becomes an established choreographer. She returns back hearing of her Dance master’s illness and discovers that the stage where her dance was nurtured faces a demolition notice. Enter the MP(Akshaye Khanna) who challenges her that if she wants to prevent the demolition, she better put up a show with the entire cast from Shamli itself. Hence, the search begins for the characters and they all fit the part to the T. The cast of course has to be as mad and varied as it could be which reminds me of yet another “cast”ing movie which told a story of “Once Upon a Time in India”( It’s Lagaan you fools. Kuch nahi ho sakta tum morons ka). The audition scene just looks like a rip off from the RDB audition scene and well, I loved the original. Here, it is pretty much forgettable. Where’s Prasoon Joshi? The ensemble jigsaw starts to take shape with the entry of some colorful characters like Ranbir Shourie, Vinay Pathak, Konkona Sen, Sushmita Chatterjee( of Karamchand fame) and of course the unputdownable Raghubir Yadav. But yet again, another assumption strikes me .The title track( yeah, the one in the news for the wrong reasons) features blue chandeliers ( Mr. Mehta has a thing for them, including breaking them in ultra slo-mo), and blue screens and absolutely gorgeous sets put up in a course of a day. Am I questioning the power of Bollywood?

Moving on, of course the entire ensemble goes through a lot of other worries, as in fitting the chemistry between the lead pair, the dance training, the corrupt MP( Akhilendra Mishra, better known as Krur Singh ‘Yakku’ from Chandrakanta), the greedy businessman (Irrfan Khan) and the challenging MP who loves Pizzas apparently.But somehow, Madz manages to swoop in and put up a brilliant show, even when Laila’s Abba is picked up just minutes before the final show ( not even the final rehearsal and all). And OMFG, the final show is so perfectly lyrical, the music is top-notch, no one forgot their lines, everyone danced in sync( hey, where did these toned bodies with the 6 packs come from? ) and my oh my, the choreography and the lights blend and flow like the satin that hangs from Laila’s window. Who handled all of that? But of course, Madhuri, I mean Diya. She must have grown so much as a choreographer. If you can do with all of the above assumptions, (I did, partially) you’ll end up grooving to Aaja Nachle. And I think everyone in my auditorium resonated with that groove.

Talking about the soundtrack, the movie begins with Dance with Me, which instantly took me to Dil to Pagal Hai and the familiar Shiamak Davar danceroom. Only that,its Vaibhavi Merchant here who’s giving the cues. The intro song just makes the point that Madhuri cannot just only dance, but dance far better than anyone out there. A straight challenge. A few minutes later, she is dancing Kathak with her Ghungroos on to Rahat Fateh Ali Khan’s O Re Piya. This song is my favorite and well, I loved the Ghungroo sounds added to it (which is absent in the OST). The tile track Aaja Nach Le is just a forgettable number which you’d be repeatedly hearing on radios and Puja Pandals this year, because of the utterly predictable Bollywood spiced up sound in it. Nothing remarkable,except for the yummy choreography and Madhuri dancing to it.BTW, the so called “controversial” lyrics reported goes something like:-

Mohale mein kaise mara mar hai,
Bole mochi bhi khud ko sonar hai

( There is so much chaos in the society, Even the Cobbler calls himslef a Goldsmith). I really don’t get what is the fuss about. Moving on,the cast audition song Show me Your Jalwa is a typical Nautanki flavored song with the voices of Madhuri herself doing the narration and Richa Sharma and Kailash Kher displaying the power of their lungs with the powerful rendition of “Zamane ko Bida Kar De..” .Soniye Mil Jaa shows you Vinay Pathak can dance as well and he is hilarious and as usual Sukhwinder Singh does the job perfectly. The Laila Majnu sequence song “Koi Patthar se naa Mare” is just an add to the soundtrack because the musical needs it, but doesn’t add to the quality. Is Pal and Ishq Hua are both duets by Sonu Nigam and Shreya Ghosal which can be effectively recycled across any Yashraj flick. Not meaning that the songs were any bad, but well, weren’t integral or great either, and somehow I can’t remember which one was which.

The performances from the ensemble characters could have been much better, but it is too much to expect, is it? Konkona Sen is an actor of a different league and she didn’t do justice to her caliber. Kunal Kapoor looks and plays the stud he is, but well, that’s it. The love chemistry between the play’s lead pair, just didn’t work for me. Vinay Pathak as usual, brings the 9 inch smile whenever he gets the screentime, and Ranbir Shourie as Mohan,CEO of Mohan Hotel is perfect as the real Majnu/Devdas. Akshaye Khanna’s role is just limited to a few conversations but somehow he manages to pull it off. Divya Dutta and Irrfan Khan have again put up roles shorter than what deserves their potential, and still managed to shine. Raghuvir Yadav, love his unchoreographed dance and unscripted acting. But of course the movie belongs to Madhuri.

Madhuri sizzles and takes control of the entire movie and it wouldn’t be wrong to say that everybody else was just a member of a supporting cast. She can shake that leg far better than any actress we have today (I know I’m repeating myself over and over again), she can act better than any actress today, and well, she looks as pretty as ever. True that the role has been written keeping her in mind. Beat this! An uncle, probably in his 60s, says while he walks out of the theatre “15 saal pehle Dhak Dhak ki Dhadkan abhi tak nahi gayee” (I saw her Dhak Dhak 15 years ago, and I still feel the pulse).

While I’d give this movie 2 stars out of 5, add another one coz a Star is already there. Madhuri did "Show her Jalwa".

Blog of the Day Award

2007-11-30T10:36:00.000-08:00

Yippeeeee!!!! So after the Flogger Award, I just won the Blog of the Day Award. Feels jubilant. But I think I should get back to my senses. So, here's the code to be pasted.

Lovely. This weekend it's gonna be Aaja Nach Le. Expect a longer post than my OSO review. Peace. Thanks for the love!!!

Flogger Award ...Yippee

2007-11-22T05:01:00.000-08:00

Apparently I've won the Flogger Award(some award for blogs...doesn't matter as long as its an award) courtesy Fattebaaz.com. So the badge is here.

And well, Congratulations to me, and thanks to Mum and Dad,SPC,all my dear friends, and of course to all the readers of Magnum Opus who have survived through the tension of my words here. Get ready for some more. This award has already given an effect of 300mg of Steroids. Shall be right back with some good reviews.

Protest for Nandigram

2007-11-13T09:26:00.000-08:00

This is a protest image protesting the recent barbaric violence at Nandigram in West Bengal,India. The brutality caused innocent lives and homeless people. To quote Wordsworth:

Have I not reason to lament
What man has made of man?

Please join the Blog Protest campaign and let the world know. For more on it read this and this.
Spread the WORD!As a blogger, that's the least you can do.

Om SWEET Om!

2007-11-10T00:40:00.000-08:00

I have "Ajab Si" playing in a loop for the 16th time now on my Creative 5.1 and no,I am not exaggerating. As I sit down to write on the movie Om Shanti Om, all I can remember is the ethereal eyes, the strategically placed dimple, the Goddess like smile and the beauty we all know by the name of Deepika Padukone. She has arrived and Bollywood,stand up and take notice. I went to see this movie not because of the much talked about sculpted physique of SRK, nor for the 31 guest starred Title Track, nor for Farah Khan's directorial skills. I went for only one reason-pretty obvious one, you do the math, my hormones are all over the place!! I paid 59 bucks for the ticket and I swear, the first glance made it all even-stevens and every scene that followed was a Diwali Bumper Lottery for me, which was striking the Jackpot and made me feel I was Gladstone eh! Take the scene when she lifts the veil, and my jaw dropped on the floor and all I could speak out was "FISHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" ( which is a jargon we used to say in our college, in lieu of the other famous F word, you know..).

Deepika is Vyjantimala meets the Diwali Pathaka-Cover South Indian beauty meets Vogue and Ralph Lauren meets non-plastic Aishwarya meets each and every friggin beautiful lady who knocks your socks off. It is like listening to Master of Puppets for the first time, except this one's heavier in a completely different way. OMFG!!! I am emotionally drained and I think I'm in love again. Last time was when I saw Malena, and the time before that was when I saw La Isla Bonita performed by Alizee. That's a different story.

*************SPOILERS AHEAD*************

The story here is Om Shanti Om. Farah Khan's second directorial venture comes from her own writing desk, but is a straight rip-off/tribute( whatever) to the Subhash Ghai retro-reincarnation magnum opus KARZ. We even get to see some reels of Rishi Kapoor in the original Om Shanti Om song. Only that, Simi Garewal is Arjun Rampal(they both share the same hairstyle,I swear) and SRK and Deepika play Rishi Kapoor(It takes two to fill a Kapoor's shoe-Quote of the Day).There's no Tina Munim Ambani here, yeah but a Ghai cameo indeed.The story begins in the late 70-early 80s era of Bollywood. I think Farah has a strong inclination to the era of Jawanee Diwanee, the bobby prints, the huge wigs, the badminton courts with white pants and pink salwars, and of course Extra Large Collars for extra protection( I donno from what!).The entire retro look could have been done much better which at parts was feeling like pieces of make up peeling off from a Ramsay flick Heroine. But then, all in all the special effects made it all up. The Sunil Dutt-Rajesh Khanna-Jeetendra morphed song was absolutely brilliant( reminded me of the first time I saw Forrest Gump). The lookalike party was ewww for me coz it freaks me out everytime to see a fake Dev Anand.( I mean one is enough,..I mean there can be only one Dev Anand, respect Dev Saab!!! )

I really don't know if making a Bollywood movie is as dysfunctional as it was shown here. You know the kind where the Director is dragged along and is manipulated by the Producer and probably a famous Lead Actor/Actress. SRK does a pretty well job, but hey! he has overdone it. I mean the gym regime. And it all shows on his face. He looks 10 years older, which means he looks 50. The abs are perfect no doubt! Coming back to the special effects, picture perfect. The fire sequences are one of the never seen before scenes in Bollywood and have been handled pretty amazingly. The art direction is also very commendable. The retro studio feel, the chandeliers , the stairs and all the candles shouted one and only one point ie. this is the Diwali movie of the year. And this is similar to the Thanksgivin' season of Movie releases in Hollywood. You know this is our LOTR. We got it all. The perfect masala in full throttle bay beh. Farah Khan knows how to do it just right. If it's masala, we make it Yummy. Featuring the biggest Guest Appearance Song with stars from the retro league to the now-Bollywood-A-league and well the sub-junior league comprising of Dino,Arbaaz,Aftab,Amrita,Malaika et al.
P.S.Shilpa Shetty is WHOA!!! TNT.

Om Shanti Om intelligently makes a spoofy-tribute to the different genres of Indian filmmaking.Be it Quickgun Murugun-the Rajni-isque Cowboy who's tag line is -Mind It(thhh)! or the Sindoor dialogue, ,the Red Chaddi Mohabbat Man,the overacting, melodramatic mother-Kirron Kher , the rhyming acceptance speech or even the "tharkee" Producer.The mock Filmfare Award thing was a riot of laughter for the batch of girls who were sitting next to me who fainted just at the glimpse of AB Jr. Another thing worth mentioning is the RING inspired scene, when Deepika is busy combing her hair.That was awesome!!!LOL. I LOVED IT. ABSO-FRIGGIN-LUTELY.

The music just uplifts me everytime I listen to it. Trivia time: Pyarelal of Laxmikant Pyarelal has done the arrangement of the Dhoom Tana Song in a very 80'ish style.You know the Sridevi in an Apsara costume with Jeetendra in his yellow pants and lots of Sarees and Pots and huge percussions kind of arrangement where you need 120 strings to play simultaneously when Sridevi 's chin touchers Jeetendra's chin. Dhoom Tana takes you to that era and it still doesn't feel out of the place. Dastaan-e-Om Shanti Om sung by Shaan is very very-Ek Hasina Thi. The recap song with the musical flashback. The background score by Sandeep Chowta is brilliant. The bass rhythm on this song is very heavy.\m/ .Jaag Soona Soona by Rahat Fateh and Richa Sharma is a sufi-isque song which is pretty decent, a good song individually, but then when the entire soundtrack is so brilliant, this qualifies as the out of focus song which everyone won't remember after the movie.Dard-e-Disco is signature Sukhwinder. The Deewangi-guest Item song is just one of those run-of-the-mill Bollywood bhangra songs you hear a DJ playing now and then and is just average. NOW READ CAREFULLY. While Ajab Si would remain my favorite track in the movie for the sole reason of where this song is featured, my vote for the best song of the album goes to Main Aggar Kahoo by Sonu Nigam and Shreya Ghoshal. What a track!! Sonu takes the entire soundtrack to a level best described as zenith.That's it.

Finally,Ajab Si interestingly doesn't start( both the times) from the Mukhda. It begins with ..."Aayee aisi Raat Hai Jo bahut Khushnaseeb Hai..." in the first half and in the second half it begins with "...Tere Saath Saath aisa..koi Nuur aaya hai", and both are the intro songs of Deepika ( the rebirth thing, yeeah!). KK does a very good job and he could land up winning the Filmfare for this finally.The lyrics by Vishal is heartfelt and inspiring, as in he is the lead vocalist of Pentagram and he wrote Ajab Si-WHOA!!!

Now as I (am expecting to)recover slowly from the Deepika fever in the next few days, I can only say this. FORGET SAAWARIYA.I haven't seen it and I don't even care to give it a glance. This is the Diwali movie of the year by all means. Grab your popcorn because this reminds you what it used to be like being at the movies. SRK still rules at this age. DDLJ was released in 1995,12 years back and the girls still love him!! And Deepika,aaah!!!Sigh!
She came, I saw, she conquered.

FIN!

Jab we Clicked!

2007-11-05T21:53:00.000-08:00

Jab We Met-what a silly title!- what a cool movie!Fast, heartfelt, sincere and real dialogues, no fake melodramas and wonderful. Shahid and Kareena really make it work. But much of the credit goes to the el-capitano Dir:Imitaz Ali who has infused the movie with the dew freshness ( I wish Fa was one of the sponsors and they had a shower scene..lol) which is hardly seen in Bollywood romance.It is finally done. Shahid Kapoor and Kareena Kapoor never looked "the Made for each other" couple until this movie happened. Trust me, it's written in stone now. It is a brilliant follow up to Diro Imtiaz Ali's bubbly and fresh romantic film-Socha Na Tha, which I loved and you know what,this one's even better.

The story is pretty predictable, the sequences and dialogues aren't, in a very good way. The story gives me a kind of dejavu' of earlier forgotten flicks like the Abhi-Ash bummer "Dhai Akshar Prem Ke" which was inspired from "A Walk in the Clouds", and well, the Govinda Urmilla starrer-Kunwara. It somehow also reminded me of the recent Cameron Crowe film"Elizabethtown" in a very special way. Uncanny!! But yeah, I started comparing Kareena with Kirsten Dunst and she ended up doing a pretty good job. Full of life,zeal and enthusiasm and equally childish-childlike ideas. Kareena is brilliant as the big mouth,no-brainer chic(no offense), is absolutely credible and fun to watch. The story is of Aditya (Shahid), son of a late business tycoon,who's entire business empire starts to fall because of his father's demise, and his girlfriend dumps him to get married to someone else. Frustrated by life, Aditya steps into a random train, and sets off aimlessly, attempting suicide and saved by Geet(Kareena). What happens next is a journey that brings Aditya and Geet closer and in the process, Aditya finds a new life and hope in it. Aditya goes on with Geet to Bhatinda, only to be confused as his boyfriend and this results in a whole bunch of confusion which occupies the entire movie. But its fun right!

Some portions could be omitted easily, and I did feel the drag in the second half . I mean,it was going great,dude! what just happened. But the final act catches up again and we are back in the game. Throw in some real groovy Bhangra number-Nagara..and we are swaying to it. Yeah, but they could have done without the Shaan -road travel song. I mean, they could have just made it play in the background. The entire script just comes to a halt when you make the lead lipsync after that fast-paced real talk. I really haven't seen a Bollywood flick in a long time it seems!

All's well in the end and the Hero gets his HEROINe....hahaha GOTCHA. Hehe. And add to that, the spice of the item song.Mauja Mauja! Mika yeah! You say Mika-who? The one who kissed-forget it. This one's really great and I was tapping my feet throughout this number. Awesome Pritam!!! But is it another arabic song inspirado result? One question though-Why can't you just reduce a few item girls in the Mauja Mauja song, and well shoot a real Taxi Drive Outdoor Scene or a real Night Train on the tracks scene,instead of using Hot Friggin Wheel Models. I was really pissed off. Reminded me of the Turning Brain-I mean,the Burning Train!!

All in all, what you take back home is some very well written lines, and excellent scenes,perfectly executed by the Kapoor duo. Especially Shahid who has come of age. He has come a long way from Ishk Vishk to Jab We Met. Bravo. 3.5 on 5!!!

Superdope!

2007-11-05T20:27:00.000-08:00

Just when I thought that my Sunday would turn out to be yet another pathetic day in the long week I had, I decided to give a thenga ( it's an Indian PG13 version of the Middle Finger) to the strenuous week and go to the movies all by myself. I had heard all the praise and adulation about the adult, potty-mouthed comedy hit of the summer -Superbad, and I knew what to expect. Only that I also knew, it being released at the cinemas meant skipping,editing of certain vital portions. And I wasn't disappointed by the movie as well my dear Indian censors. Lemme tell you, if you are the kind who gets offended easily by the mere mention of FUCK, go grab a cup of Lemon tea, and watch this movie. You'll be changed for life( as in, you'll start to feel how cool it is , or how relieving it is to prefix,suffix your speech with the F word). Anyway, coming back to Superbad.

Seth (Jonah Hill) and Evan (Michael Cera) are best friends who will soon be graduating and going off to different colleges. The mission:Not to arrive at college as virgins. As expected, there is an utter frustration in these main protagonists of being unpopular at High School. Seth is the chubby, curly haired guy, absolutely foul-mouthed and with a clear vision: to be the drunken mistake of Jules! Evan on the other hand is the shy, reserved and has a huge thing about Becca, his high school crush and wants to make things special with her. This is their chance as High School's coming to a close and tonite is "the Jules' party! "(Jules' is Seth's culinary class mate, absolutely hot,cute and perfect ass.Sorry couldn't help mentioning about the tushy!). Of course Seth overheard about it, and asked Jules if she wanted booze for the party as they could get a Fake ID and bring in alcohol for the party;Seth of course hoping to make her get drunk and you know what next. (Let's not get all judgemental about underage drinking, and drunken mistakes and shallow hooking ups. Just enjoy this comedy).

Enter Fogell, aka McLovin' with the Fake ID who saves the day. The Fake ID here is of an organ donor from Hawaii.LOL. Christopher Mintz-Plasse as McLovin' is absolutely brilliant and plays it with the utter geekiness of a high school Bill Gates and with a mouth filled with saliva.He is the THING of the movie, just like Stifler was the THING of American Pie and not Jim. Many would debate it was Stifler's mom,anyway! Writers Seth Rogan( from Knocked Up, and who also con-stars as a rookie cop) and Evan Goldberg have infused the right spirit and perfect dialogues for the movie( I really don't know if it can get more foul-mouthed and funnier than this!). Many would agree that there is so much raunch in it than all the three American Pie movies. The entire raunch factor has been handled in a no -classy way, just because it is a teen flick,if you don't know about sex, how can you be classy eh! LOL.

The best part though(if there is any, coz this one whole huge chunk of cinema's best comedy, for this year at least) is that Dir: Greg Mottola and comedy films capitano: Judd Apatow as producer have somehow managed efficiently to bind all the raunch with an extremely sincere heart, and that is the friendship of Seth and Evan, and the insecurity of losing each other after all these years from childhood to High School.

Who am I kiddin'? That's not the best part. I love the raunch-a-rama more .From the period stains, the booze pukes, sniffin coke, shooting stop signs, random party fights, emptying detergent gallons to fill beer, to just the mere sight of refrigerator filled with golden Beer( sigh!), the utterly eww BJ jokes, and McLovin' telling-I'm in! ,balls to the walls, the list is just endless. Superbad is one big party you wanna be at.Just because it is so chaotic and there is so much booze! Woo hoo. I just wish I could see a sight of a chicken roasted on a barbecue.I love it.I love it . I read somewhere about this caption and it sounds so cool-Superbad is American Pie meets South Park. Beat that! American Park or South Pie? I got a better one (may be). Superbad is SUPERDOPE! Hell Yeah! Miss it and you miss IT.

P.S. Sources inform that there are already T-Shirts available reading: I'm McLovin'

Ram Gopal var'MA' ki Aag

2007-10-24T07:54:00.000-07:00

Interesting revelation: There was a Sanjay Dutt movie which also starred a thick-browed Chandrachur Singh(I hope that's the correct spelling, my mozilla can't spell check this one.) and Mahima Chaudhry and had a song called Lucky Kabutar. The film was called, wait for it...DAAG..the FIRE. History as they say repeats itself . And it is the turn of RGV's factory to do the honors. This time he has done it by making a sequel to DAAG..the FIRE, and it is called AAG..the STAIN-in every way possible. I mean, for Pete's sake, how can one go so wrong with a flwaless script as Sholay.

How can one go so wrong with Surma Bhopali, Jay,Veeru, Thakur,Ramlal, Gabbar and to top it Basanti? These questions haunt me sometimes and well I am sure Mr.Bachhan and his entire clan comprising of Ambanis and Amar Singh(G) would resonate with my emotions.
Funny thing, Saturday morning , my friend calls me up and tells me, "Dude, you wanna hear the dialogue of the millenium? 'Kab hai Diwali'...."

Yes, RGV ki Aag is that crap a movie. And I am gonna grab each and every chance of bashing it out to extreme degrees, because, yet again, being a responsible citizen of my country, it is my duty to avenge the disturbed minds of my dear friends who have been traumatised by the 2007 spoof of Indian Cinema's most celebrated movie. I also am amazed at the range of RGV. He is the same guy who gave us Shiva (the first one),Raat( one of the scariest Hindi movies I have seen, way ahead of its time, and with no shower scenes , in white saris ), Satya, Rangeela,Company and Sarkar. And now add to that impressive list -Ramgopal var'Ma' ki Aag. It is the most let down of his entire filmy resume.

Urmila-Very Hot!!!!!
Mohanlal Anna ,c'mon. How could you agree to do this? Did Ramu trick you? I even heard Mr.Bachhan walked out of one of the screenings unable to withstand the 70 mm torture in which he was himself being framed.
Nisha Kothari-Naacho, mooh bandh rakho aur haa..kuch pehen lo.Chahe to mooh pe patti baandh lo ..mooh bandh rakho, or else I'll tell Rakhi Auntie.
Who's that guy playing Jay? Are you high?
Ajay Devgan-what are you doing here?
Sushmita Sen - Its a widow's role, not a clear skin commercial.
Big B-You did what you wanted- Killed the soul of Gabbar. You will be answerable to Mr.Amjad Khan when he asks you," Kitne Aadmi the"--who were writing this crap-a-load-of-a-movie.
RGV-Shame Shame!!
AB Jr.-You wanna get tagged as the Item Boy with the beard and the yo yo moves. Huh?Go grab ya Razr and sit in the corner.

What my friend has to say about RGV ki Aag is : Bahut hi badbudaar movie hai. Lagta hai kisi ne nahi nahaya hai.(Which means: This movie stinks. It seems that nobody has taken a bath)

P.S. I haven't watched this movie. Thank God. Thanks Baggu.

Screen Fixed 2

2007-10-23T11:21:00.001-07:00

Movie Reviews of Movies I missed: For all the reasons

GO:
Okay what's the deal with short names in Hindi Movies. That too attached with some kinda actions. Take Daud,Run and now the recent bomber at the B.O.-GO. What is the tiny-winy thing that relates all of them?They all suck, equally in every degree possible.While RGV's Daud was enjoyable in parts which revealed Sanjay Dutt's characters name in the movie was Daya-Parvati, and Urmila's was UmaShanker.
Coming back to GO-its got someone called Gautam as the male lead,if you may say so,flexing his muscles and trying to fill each frame with more stunts than the amazing videos you get to see on Youtube. Nisha Kothari as the female lead, shows more skin than a green viper shedding on Animal Planet(both are equally fascinating in their own rights and well the latter gets more viewership). Story-Yeah,right. Another one of those 1950-60-70-80-ish cheap Bollywood flicks from Factory right in the year 2007. Is time being bent or RGV has something missing in his cranium?
What would I prefer to see instead: Any of the Ramsay Bros flicks. The music is class, the female leads have no problem shedding their saris even if they have been fighting a losing battle against obesity. (There exists a word in Webster's for this league of Actresses-Power thighs). And yeah, there is Shakti Kapoor.

BREAKING NEWS: So F#$king what if Koyel Purie is the daughter of Arun Purie,the head-honcho of India Today.That doesn't mean she can spring up any moment as a journo on each friggin frame ,wherever available.I mean c'mon.On Colgate ads enquiring if your toothpaste has salt ? What the F. And now this dumba$$ movie. I did like her in Rahul Bose's "Everybody says I'm fine" . Well, as Tyler would put it,

" The feeling starts to fade away...I used to feel your fire, but now its cold inside.."

The plot is as predictable as Himess' 16th repetition of the word 'surooooor' after 'tera..tera'. It involves more sting operations, more sleaze,more breaking news tags flashing on the idiot box than any friggin news channel but Rajat Sharma's India TV.

Factoid: When India TV was launched it had Tarun 'Tehelka' Tejpal in the editorial team, and among others, Nalini Singh and Menaka Gandhi too, until Shakti Kapoor happened. That's how you screw it all up.

What would I prefer to see instead: Any Late Night show on India TV.

Budhha Mar Gaya:

Yeah probably any Budhha should die of shame . And probably well I would after watching such a load of crap. And so I didn't. Maana ki Raakhi Sawant kuch bhi kar sakti hai. (Agreed, that Rakhi Sawant can do anything.)Agreed that Paresh Rawal, Om Puri and Anupam Kher after having done Sardar,Ardh Satya and Saaransh respectively, have landed on a shit-junction called BMG(Budhha Mar Gaya). And what the F is Ranvir Shourie doing here? OMFG, Rakhi Sawant gets to do some spanking on Prem Chopra's arse. Wanna know more. Om Puri drives his car on both sides of the road,if you know what I mean, and rubs himself against a mountain of skin (I mean an obese lady). There's a huge spectrum of characters in one wholesome family, which was last only seen in Rajshri films. Hail Rakhi maata.

What would I prefer to see instead: Anything but Rakhi Sawant.

DARLING:

Fardeen Khan has gained weight at the wrong places. In our lingo we call it suffering from 'BappiLahirosis'. Esha Deol as the psychotic, wooden face ghost ,not dressed in the traditional white sari is a welcome change from the dead pan rendition of dialogues on her GARNIER ads. Isha Kopikar as the sari clad wife(I mean sari is supposed to be the most sensual dress a woman could ever have) is just not sexy enough,not even in the trailers. Do I need any further reason why I gave it a miss and a thumbs down.

What would I prefer to see instead: Kambaqht Ishq ,Khallas and Dilbara Dilbara(the song from Dhoom, yeah the one which has a lot of Esha..if you know..I know you know)

Insanely Enjoyable!

2007-10-13T14:52:00.000-07:00

Ok here's the difference. Immad is "impotent"(well, in his speech,ie). Yes,I have not recovered from the trauma of Dil,Dosti excreta..!!!!And Mr.Naseeruddin Shah, his father, kicks serious ass. Coming back to the movie "review" or whatever, Monsoon Wedding goes down in my list as one of my hot favs. Absolutely no second thoughts. I have seen Mira Nair's other works such as Namesake, KamaSutra(for obvious reasons), and Salaam Bombay.

While Salaam Bombay remains a huge milestone in Indian cinema, it doesn't leave me as moved (read Jubilant,infectiously Celebrating,exuberant and Joyous,all in the same breath).It is difficult to write something limited of a movie that spans across all cultures,and brings together all cliche's attached to "Indian" cinema as seen by the firangs(u know ,the colors, the music and the singing routine) in a very respectable way, and simultaneously deals with intense elements of child abuse, pre arranged marital infidelity,growing old and (non)settled NRI housewives and their puttars and betis with the tag of confusion of being an ABCD...or a Muscat born whatever...phew!!!

And then you have the Event manager-wedding producer of Old Delhi and his love ,the maid who knows what an email ID is and has a name taken from the pages of Lewis Carol. Whoa! Monsoon Wedding , or Matrimonia Indiano( as it is known in Italy),has it ALL. And I love them all, from the minutest of the details that Ms Nair has put together with a brilliant ensemble cast that comprises of someone as versatile as Lilette Dubey as Mrs.Pimmi Verma,cigarette smoking-hair-curling-nervous mother of the bride, Shefali Chaya as the unmarried elder cousin Ria Verma,Parvin Dabas as the IIT alumni-Softie Export settled in Houston,Vasundhara in one of her most major roles as D-Bride (wont say a word more about here,c'mon she has already faced so much)and (in his debut)Randeep Hooda as the Muscat raised guy who dreams of Hot Indian girls.

Points to be noted:

1. Monsoon Wedding gave birth to the usage of KLPD in college lingo,and it spread like wildfire during my college days.

2. "Tej bhaisaab" became synonymous to being a pedophile, so much that we still laugh at a friend who is called Tej.Well, we treat him with some respect you see. Brilliant Job Mr.Rajat Kapoor.

3.The obtuse-angled auntie/dadeejee in white sari grooving to Chunari Chunari.Now that's called Freaking out Bay-Beh!!!

4.Shefali Chaya,what an actress yaar!The family group photo scene when she is supposed to smile while she sits below Tej Bhaisaab.That's something Brilliant.

4.Naseeruddin Shah is the greatest actor of Indian cinema.Give him the Oscar,the Golden Globes, the Golden Lion, the Golden Unicorn, damn it!!

The drenched city of Delhi also somehow blends so smoothly into the color of the movie or rather adds to the glory of it. The hustle and bustle of Chandni Chowk's Saari Bazaar, to the rickshaws and CP, to huge painted posters of Hindi Movies have been captured brilliantly. Not only does Ms Nair show this part of Delhi, but she also narrates through her characters,how globalisation has transformed us.Elements like becoming cellphone addicts,fast food, sexual freedom and all the other manifestations of the new global American culture ,Cosmopolitan mags, tattoos and well democratic chat shows like"Delhi.com"

***BING***BING***BING***ALERT
Delhi.com is one of the other points to be noted which I forgot to mention, for obvious reasons-The top dubbist Shivanita Lakhia..Bade Ladke..ROTFL

Rarely do we find a movie that brings all the chaos and components which are so cluttered, yet tied to a very sensitive string called family. I wish the KOFFEE guy could understand that family movies are not made with chiffon saris and song sequences in London or Switzerland or mansions hanging crystal chandeliers.

Most importantly, Monsoon Wedding infuses in me a feeling of TRIUMPH and well an infectious urge to dance, of course thanks to Sukhwinder Singh for Kawa Kawa, Anu Malik (singers Abhijit and Anuradha Sriram) for the hot hot number Chunari Chunari, and well Hans Raj pajee and Bally Sagoo for Aaja Nachle. Simply LIBERATING!!!!

Naseeruddin Shah is the BEST! Likhwa Lo. I mean, maine Likh Diya.And Hollywood,please don't consider him for movies where he has to play a bloody bearded thick-accented Maharaja called Captain Nemo. Bollywood tum khush raho!

Dil, Dosti,Excreta!!

2007-09-29T22:52:00.000-07:00

I watched Jenna Jameson and Tera Patrick being banged to cleanse myself from the trauma and disturbia that left me numb for the 45 odd minutes I spent at the theatre watching Manish Tiwary's Dil Dosti etc. This is a movie which has left me disturbed to the core, more than ever.Of course, can't promise that this tops my worst movies list, but well it might qualify as a very strong contender. Immad Shah(Naseeruddin Shah's son) plays Apurv with a deadpan look throughout and a speech style which can be best expressed as "impotent". Wonder how's he gonna complete the hat-trick he keeps talking about.Forget talking about comparisons, because we know how good an actor Mr.Shah Senior is. I am talking about an individual performance and to be precise, it sucked more than a Black Hole (as in the Black Hole, not the one you are imagining.Of course, all you can imagine after this movie is what you are thinking of.) What has happened to Smriti Mishra? As my friend puts it,"One of the most disturbing scenes on celluloid is the frame of the prostitute with the sagging belly". And well I have a word for it-Eww!! Isshitta Sharma (more famous in our circle as Preeti Patel from Loins of Punjab) disappoints as the school girl who is confused whether she wants to or not to get laid, or well I don't really care what is the confusion. Shreyas Talpade as Sanjay Mishra, the future politician from Bihar is a complete misfit in the ensemble.

The synopsis at IMDb for this movie reads: Dil Dosti Etc is a fresh, unabashed, no holds barred look at how young men of today think and choose to live their lives.
My take: Mr.Tiwary and Mr.Prakash Jha ,get a grip and hold on to your lives first. Focus. Please just dont excrete on the celluloid and give it a title.

Regrets: I am not gonna get those 45 minutes of my life.
Watch it if you are emotionally blackmailed or if Preeti Patel is your fiance'.

Johnny Scores!!

2007-09-29T02:29:00.000-07:00

Neons,Red neons, Yellow Milestones, Pune Railway Station,Lancers, maroon Maruti 800, Bombay-Pune Highway,more Neons and UV Lights in da Club, no Bling Bling, only CASH and Bam Bam. Phew!! What a ride!!Johnny Gaddar is ..wait for it...the Best Hindi movie of its genre. Should I say that again or was I loud enough to make my point clear? ADLABS presents, ...Sriram Raghavan's...and then Boom. The title credits are absolutely a thing to watch and watch out for. Awesome is the Word..or is it Legendary. Ok, I should come out of the Barney-shell and just tell you more about the movie and why I loved it.

Reason 1: Solely for the title credits which is a huge tribute in its own right to all the 60's and 70's thrillers, especially ( and well clearly mentioned too) to Vijay Anand's works from Johnny Mera Naam( from which the movie's title has been taken) to Jewel Thief . I definitely felt that Mr.Raghavan always wanted to pay a kind of homage to them, and what rightfully done!!
In scenes like, Rimi Sen reading R.K.Narayan's 'Guide'( made into a film by Vijay Anand) or well, Vikram, the protagonist who is a big Big-B fan, watches Parwana (may be for his influences eh!) to Johnny Mera Naam. Well,there are other trivial stuff too which would soon make their way on the trivia list of IMDb like, while Shiva is being called the first time, he is watching Kubrick's Eyes Wide Shut. The movie also brings back the genre of "Kaun-Kaise-Kaha-Kyun" in a very crisply done script just like taken from the pages of " James Hadley Chase".

Reason 2: This is not a Who-Dun-it? It is more of how did he-when did he-kinda flick, and it continously kept me( and also all the people at the theatre) at the edge of my seat and made me wonder, about what next?It made me think and think, and hold on to the chair tight, made me wanna kick the guy sitting in front of me talking over the phone, cause I was sensing the air of suspense and was totaly gripped by the claws of this reel-o-magic.

Reason 3: The entire cast,from the mastermind of the "plan-A" Seshadri (Dharmendra) to Prakash a.k.a Pakya(Vinay Pathak) to the very briefly kept Twinkle a.k.a Mrs.Shardul (Rimi Sen),everyone has been able to pull off exactly what the film expected them to. Debutante Neil Mukesh as Vikram a.k.a Johnny G is a discovery. He is not just plain wood as the other six-packs,sculpted physique league of bloody ordinary gentlemen are, but makes his presence felt throughout and has been absolutely successful in making the character of Johnny Gaddar come to life. Johnny isnt a strong guy, he is a smart guy. He has his weaknesses and he is scared of the bigger and stronger Cons. But his smartness,his luck and his perfect timing makes his Plan-B work. And Neil makes us believe that he IS Johnny while he deceives and betrays everyone. Last but not the Least, Zakir Hussain as Shardul is absolutely brilliant and Ashwini Kalsekar as Mrs.Pakya a.k.a Beauty Parlor is the icing on the Cake. Go watch the movie to find out why.

Reason 4: The movie includes PUNE. Yippeee. From Pune Station to MG Road, to glimpses of Magnum Mall and Bombay Garage(was it?) . Woo hoo. I loved it.

Reason 5: all of the ABOVE and even more. Johnny G offered me a slice of Tarantino even in vernacular. Especially the scene when Shardul is being hit and falls down back-first on his glass center table. Kill Bill revisted. Woohoo. What I liked most about the movie besides the Title Credits, is the pace at which the movie carried on. There are no extras or fillers or any element of Priyadarshan or RGV ki Aag. I have watched Mr.Raghavan's previous flick "Ek Hasina Thi" and I thought it was a good movie. Johnny G just surpasses all the expectations I had. It is a brilliantly made movie in all aspects, from the sets to the script to the action chodeography to the fast paced editing to the jaw-dropping fast cinematography which captures the closed Train Toilets to the dim-lit compartments as brilliantly as the crowded dance floor of Club Escape or the intense nightmare mood of Vikram's apartment.Shankar-Ehsan-Loy's score is set to set the mood of the movie and it does it well. Just well enough. But it is a bit too loud at times, or perhaps I am too claustrophobic for closed club Sounds.

Complaints: Only complaints are that it is a rated-A movie. So well, besides the Bam-Bam and the Dhishum Dhishum, I wanted some Muah-Muah too. Not that the movie did not have any scope for it. Rimi and Neil could have had a moment . Friggin!!!!! Just when you thought that it was flawless, my hormones popped-out. LOL.
Need I say more. A word more spoken and I would start sounding like I have been paid for the publicity of this movie. Go watch it and you will and shall LOVE it.
3.5 out of 5.

Loins of Punjab Presents

2007-09-22T07:17:00.000-07:00

Loins of Punjab Presents is a riot of laughter through and through. Abso-Friggin-Lutely Hilarious. It is a beautiful ensemble piece,yet a very disorganised one jumbled together like a mismatched jigsaw puzzle which only starts taking shape and form as the story unfolds. The pieces here are equally colorful and hilarious in their own way.

To begin with ,the organisers and the title sponsors of the main event . Loins of Punjab is an organisation which has been run by an NRI who made it big in the US by well selling pork loins. They happen to be the title sponsors of a Talent hunt contest (like the many that we see on TV these days, yet very different) and the event management company that handles the event is Bokade Mgmt Company, run by a certain Mr.Bokade who believes Gypsy Kings turn women horny.

The talent hunt is the search for a Desi Idol , the songs would be only in Hindi, and the grand prize is a handsome 25G. The contestants: Preeti Patel & the Patel Squad. Needless to mention here how the Gujjus enjoy their Theplas and self packed Dhoklas EVERYWHERE. They sure know how to have a Good Time and well bargain at that too. Next in Line is a White Guy , Joseph Cohen who loves everything Indian including his girlfriend Opam ( Ayesha Dharkar).

There's also the high society ,stiff upper lip and envious Mrs. Rrita Kapoor ( Shabana Azmi) who wants to win the competition just to win the prize and donate it to some women fundraiser( you know , high society show offs). There's a Business Analyst, Vikram Tejwani (played by the Director Manish Acharya ) who talks in numbers and well his love interest eventually, Sania Rehman who pretends to know Hindi, a guy who got fired for his name being Saddam Hussein, and to top it all, Ajay Naidu as the Turbanotorious B.D.G. , the Bhangra King raplord.

I can just go on praising about this character, but its better to just say , BRILLIANT. B.D.G.s intro happens in a open mic night when he comes up with his partner, with the turban on, and in typical Yo-Hip-Hop-Hustle Style shows some Respecc to his Fols, Mummy-G and Papa-G and begins his rap with Yo-MadaF@#$ and F@#$ U ***. You get it. I was roaring with laughter.
Well, I had not seen any promos of the movie whatsoever and to be frank did not have any sort of expectations with the movie. But well, I was bursting out with laughter in the very first 2 minutes of the movie and it continued till the end credits. To say that the movie was funny would be an understatement.

Debutante Director Manish Acharya has done a very commendable job and dealt with extreme expertise handling the mad cast of the movie and has made every inch of the movie whacky and whackier without resorting to cheap slapstick humor.

I have seen a lot of these Indy-Indie Humor Flicks on ABCDs and NRIs. But this is by far the best.The jokes are a take on post 9-11 America, the ethnic backgrounds that comprise of the brown population of New Jersey, the Gay Fashion Desginers, the Gay-Brown-Bhangra-Pop Guy singing Khoon Kharaaba, the elite Socialites and to top it all how the National Anthem binds us all ,no matter what. I guess I haven't had such a good laugh since Khosla ka Ghosla .Loins of Punjab Presents is a wholesome entertainer, but well do mind the A-Rating. From me its 3.5 stars. BRAVO.

Transformers

2007-09-21T04:04:00.000-07:00

Its another one of those Michael Bay Blockbusters blown out of proportion. There is so much action filled into this one than all the summer action flicks combined and multiplied thrice. And no, I am not exaggerating. With a price tag of 150 million $ , the Transformers sure didn't come cheap, and well it shows, clearly with each and every scene.Michael Bay is well, known for that.His last few works haven't made a big impression on me though. The very forgettable Island, the Titanic-isque 'Pearl Harbor'( but I loved Pearl Harbor), and well Ben Affleck in the orange suit, what was that Movie with the Aerosmith soundtrack?

Anyway, coming back to Transformers, the Hasbro franchise and the zillion year old mythology of Cars and vehicles transforming into Metal Monsters made popular by an equally old Cartoon Series. Sounds like every 6 to 16 year old boy's fantasy. I personally haven't been a fan to the whole Transformers franchise and well, frankly speaking haven't seen any of the cartoons. But well, the movie just doesn't need any prerequisites.

The voice of Optimus Prime(Peter Cullen) welcomes us to the universe where machines rule SUPREME.If you want me to tell you the plot, mail me. This ain't the place.LOL. Anyway, there are good machines who want to prevent the human race from being hurt , and there are the bad ones who well want to beat the crap out of the good ones. And there is well the EVIL one , who is deep in sleep(made to sleep by Liquid Nitrogen), and there is the Underdog who has the good ones to his side. You fit in the pieces. Quite predictable.

But yes, as I mentioned before. When you walk in to watch a Michael Bay film, you go in to enjoy . Just forget the performances, forget there are even humans existing in the movie. Just sit back, and buckle up your seat belts as you are set in for a roller coaster ride.

The SFX are very finely woven with live action feed and makes it impossible for the human eye( at least the two I know) to distinguish between real and the UNreal. The effects to be simply put are jaw-dropping and the sequences give a new meaning to the word Action Powerhouse. It's the transformation of robots that will blow your mind .

Add that to the eye-popping robot smackdowns and good old fashioned car chases, and you have a movie that is going to get your blood pumping and your heartbeat racing. I came away convinced I'd had the most sheer, loud fun of any blockbuster in a summer that has delivered too little of that quantity.Well, what can I say, I really wonder if my movie ticket could get me so much for so less.Phew. 4 STARS and a Thumbs up to Michael Bay.

Ratatouille

2007-09-21T03:15:00.000-07:00

Let me begin with..It was Delicious. Absolutely. Frame to Frame, Edge to Edge. The Master Chefs at PIXAR have done it yet again. Just when I thought how on earth can anyone better the Incredibles or Nemo, they have done it yet again, proving that it is not done yet for PIXAR. Far from it.
To begin with , well ,I loved the short animated feature before the movie and also the preview of the next summer Pixar Release.

Coming back to Ratatouille, it is so heartfelt and sincere, and the emphasis on the characterisation is so honest to the core that you just can't stop applauding the genius of the PIXAR guys, along with enjoying the visual delight of the animated French Delicacies in all their grandeaur.

Initial reactions over a movie which has a Rat as the main protagonist would definitely throw reactions of it being considered as yet nother dosage of slapstick humour that we have grown with and perhaps, been fed too much. But trust me on this, Ratatouille excels as the best G-rated entertainer, the best food movie, and perhaps, one of the best comedies better than most of the PG-13 and R-Rated Teen Flicks filled with skimpily clad bombshells and dumber brains.

Just don't tempt me to reveal the plot. It is awesome. Ok, well what the heck, here it is.

The story is about a young French blue rodent named Remy (voiced by comic Patton Oswalt), who is gifted with an extraordinary sense of smell and taste buds.He's positively inspired by a TV cooking show with Chef Anton Gusteau (Brad Garrett), whose motto is "Anyone can cook!"
When Remy is accidentally swept into a storm drain, he turns up at Gusteau's restaurant in Paris, which has fallen on hard times.

Gusteau is dead, the place has been demoted to three stars (from five) - and the place is lorded over by Skinner (Ian Holm), a diminutive despot who has licensed Gusteau's name for dubious frozen foods.A rat, of course, is less than welcome in the kitchen - except by the ghost of Gusteau.

The spirit encourages Remy to surreptitiously turn a soup accidentally ruined by a bumbling kitchen assistant named Linguini (Lou Romano) into a culinary masterpiece.When the talentless Linguini is ordered to duplicate this masterpiece, he's forced to turn to Remy as his partner.

Hiding under Linguini's toque, Remy yanks on the young man's hair like a puppeteer to steer him to the proper ingredients and spices.
This Chaplin-caliber physical comedy, which puts most live-action comedies to shame, is alone worth the price of admission.

Its one helluva watch. A plot filled with surprises, beautiful visuals (one of which includes the spellbounding scene of the Eiffel Tower), great characters ranging from the main character Remy, the rat who wants to be a Chef and Linguini,the clueless,gangly dishwasher, and the entire bunch of chefs .

Another noteworthy character is Janeane Garofalo as the very French Colette, the only woman in the Gusteau kitchen - and, with more than a little help from Remy, Linguini's love interest
The one that kinda steals the climax is definitely Anton Ego, voice given by Hollywood legend Peter O' Toole. I don't know how to put it in any other form .O' Toole's voice just sinks in the character so bloody well.

The details of the animation just make me look at it with my eyes wide open and just wonder in awe. Because everything is so real. From the sauce stained aprons of the Chefs, the Copper Pots, the Mint Garnish,the beads of moisture on the freshly cut vegetables to the matt fur of the rodents, everything is Perfect. The chodeography of a busy restaurant kitchen, to the intense chase scenes on the street of Paris, it has it all.

Just go watch it, absolutely unmissable.Its the perfect Entertainer in a long long time.Written and directed by Brad Bird and displaying the usual meticulousness associated with the Pixar brand, “Ratatouille” is a nearly flawless piece of cinema. It provides the kind of deep, transporting pleasure, at once simple and sophisticated. Spare me the Ratings. This goes beyond that. I would give it a 100.Prepare to be very hungry.

Screen Fixed

2007-07-14T13:47:00.000-07:00

What is up with the movies? Well, the last movie I watched was Die Hard 4.0. It has been two weeks since and I haven't seen any. Faced with the question what the F will I blog,( I really don't care if anyone is reading this or not),I decided upon writing upon the trailers of the movies I missed, wanted to watch and couldn't , or I probably I never wanted to watch,or the ones I watched and never wrote about.

Movies I saw, and didn't write about until now.
To start with POTC-At World's End.

Yeah, given that El Capitano jack Sparrow cracks me up every time, this flick just didn't work for me. Firstly, because I was too consumed by the fact that Aerosmith would be performing the very next day and I would be watching them, and secondly becuase Keira Knightley,Orlandoo Bloom, Heavily Made Up Geoffrey Rush,and an army of dentally challenged,extremely filthy pirates sailing to the world's end,fighting octopusses and slimy monsters did nothing to keep me on the edge of my seat. Well, primarily so, because we have been there and seen it all already, and evrything seemed like Pirates 2 screened again, with a more complicated storyline, which I really didn't care to follow.

NextUp: Sivaji.The Boss. Aah.I did watch Sivaji, with a Telegu guy who knew elementary Tamil I sure did ruin his movie experience by asking him every 5 mins about the plot.
Well, you really dont need to know Tamil to enjoy Sivaji. Especially, with an audience which starts whistling at the mere sight of Rajni's shoes. The jokes, oh, I couldn't get em, my incapability, but the crowd seemed to love it. Rajni earns hundreds of crores abroad by working as an IT professional ( VISA Power, go get it!). Comes back home to set up a medical college. Bad guy doesnt want him to. Corrupt guys ask more moola.Rajni shows "thenga" (That's the Indian PG Version of the Middle Finger) and sweeps all of them off their feet, in a very unromantic way.His lady love on the other hand wants him to be get Fair and Handsome , or else the relation is over. Tormented Rajni goes in the pool of Multani Mitti, has Papaya facials, puts on Manish Malhotra desinger jackets,and fights the goondas at his ladylove's music store. Throw in some Rahman scores, 20 different hairdos including a bald look,and catchy lines like---Coool, Finisshh...whats not to like or love?

Some of the movies I didn't see and why?
Ck2MK-Chain Khuli Ki Main Khuli. Puhleezzz, I prefer to refer it as the dialogue from Satte pe Satta
The Train-Catch Ya Never,coz, Some Lines should Never be Crossed. Sure, the threshold of the screening room playing the Train.
Premonition-Premo who...????Sandra Bullock. Next please
Fool N Final--Already have downloaded the video Ye Dooriya. So , am good.
Shootout at Lokhandwala - hmm. I wanted to see it, but I got affected by the virus of Vicky Pollard, the symptoms being frequent uttering of " yeah but no but yeah but no but yeah but no..."""""
Red Swastika: When is Mithun Da's next releasing?

Some of the movies I really had to NOT see.

JBJ: When the promos were out, and AB Sr. did a Jack Sparrow on a Bhangra No. by Shankar Ehsaan, with the Yashraj films Banner gleaming below,first reactions were, no matter what, even if its crap, I will go to watch the movie. At Least for the songs. I got the soundtrack, and fell in love with Bol Na Halke Halke, sung by Rahat Fateh Ali Khan.
Friday Came, and my friend called. You are watching this movie over my dead body. I had no other options.

Apne:hehahahahaha..Kutte Kamine...I felt scared..what if the Deols teared the screen open..I mean for God's sake it ain't one..not two, but all three of 'em.
And Sunny Paaji playing Rocky Balboa for Papajee. I think, I'd better settle for Ghayal's DVD.

Aap ka Suroor: I didn't like the spelling mistake. I couldn't believe that a movie of this stature with an actor like Himmesssss could be released with spelling mistakes in its promotional posters.I felt let down.Yeah,on a serious note, primarily because , I ,being a responsible citizen of this nation, wanted to protect my fellow countrymen from the possible torture they call: Aap ka Suroor,the Sequel to the Reaalll Love Storyy.And I have failed to do so. Even after holding myself down and controlling the curiosity I had to watch Himesss on big screen, curiosity got the better of millions of my fellow countrymen,and yes, the sequel is happening. Aaj, khusshh to bahut hoge tum. Himess , you must be proud to have yur pic on me blog. Haayy

Awarapan: The Paki Music Techno Remix didn't work for me this time.BTW, I havent watched Zeher,Wo Lamhe and even Gangster.

Naqaab: Please No. Abbas Mustan are the biggest cost cutters, do you know. I wont watch their movie until they change their attire. They have been wearing the same white shirt, and white pant, I mean the same, since Khiladi was released. The VHS tape of Khiladi has got all the reels demagnetised and Wada Raha plays backwards, Ayesha Jhulka is now on Telebrands, but Abbas Mustan still haven't changed their white dress. Has TIDE sponsored all of their movies?

Bong Connection: Simply because, it isn't getting released in Pune.But I am sure that I'll catch it in Kolkata.

Harry Potter: Bachho ne Sab Tickets le liye. No tickets for me. Boohooo

Too Much 4.0

2007-06-30T06:42:00.000-07:00

Geeks Free for Dry Fart

That is what I would like to call it.Doesn't make sense, but it rhymes!Anyway, going back to the movie,the good thing is it is worth all of the 60 bucks I spent on it on a Saturday morning. But was it worth of me waking up on a Saturday morning , hungry and sleepy, rushing to the multiplex,braving the rain of Pune, which left me drenched .Well to some extent yes,coz it was money's worth. Now that I have started sounding like a baniya, lets just tell you, that this is a movie solely for those who swear by the Masala Hollywood Potboilers, and for those who go to the theatres to watch a piece of magnificent moviemaking, I'd rather recommend them to stay indoors, get hold of a Spielberg DVD instead, and just get cozy with their remote. For others like me, its nostalgia revived and its time to say hello to 'Detective' John McClane(Bruce Willis, did I actually need to mention it),well for the 4th time.

The plot: based upon an article from Wired entitled "A Farewell to Arms"by John Carlin,is as simple as one could be.It's actually about confusing the entire audience about how technology can take a toll of the entire functioning system of a country and how crooked minds ( moles in FBI and hired Russian chamche) can use it to blow up their bank balances.Hmm, sounds quite original.Lost in this digital chaos,is our very analog ,good old McClane who is trying to make sense of it all,with the help of a Hacker,Matt Farell(Justin Long) and fatty accomplice Warlock(Kevin Smith) to save America from the wrath of ex-Fed Thomas Gabriel (Timothy Olyphant, last seen in Girl next Door, remember the guy who planned about the shooting of prom video Version ahem.ahem!!!).

Anyway,assisting Gabriel is hot chi(n)ckie Mai Lihn (Maggie Q) who kicks some serious McClane Ass ,kung fu style, while deploying some serious code simultaneously.I never knew geeks( Geeks here do not necessarily mean people who are "Geeks",you know, more like a Techie)could be hot as well.Well, none that I know of. At the end of it, McClane manages to save the day, and after a whooping 2hrs and 40 mins roller coaster ride,McClane survives with a few scratches and a shoulder shot and also manages to find a Techie(won't use Geek this time)future son-in-law .See, who said only Karan Johar said "It's all about loving your family".

The problem: I personally enjoyed every bit of every green dollar spent on this movie. Because it all showed on the screen.Cars banging each other, Old-school, bare-knuckle, wham-Bam sequences, Fighter Planes exploding , our Hero and his sidekick being hunted down in Dark Tunnels, Cars being thrown on them,SUVs on a Lift, Concrete Bridges breaking, Cars bringing down Choppers, and of course John McClane bringing down armies of assasins with just a handgun.

But after a while, it stats getting on you. Simply put, you start drawing parallels between McClane and our very own Mithun Da or Rajnikanth Anna (no offense). It is too much action happening around you, and McClane still manages to survive through each and every obstacle as if hopping through turtles in Super Mario.
And well, not to mention ,the many cliches attached to this genre.The geeks know it all,the villains are supergeniuses and also have been trained in combat fighting, Russians are always bad hackers, carrying MP5s ,no matter what, there is always a good hacker who can encrypt everything up and show an "up-yours" in a decrypted way,Hackers always type on the keyboard very fast and never use their mouse,the FBI is dumb and arrives late, Operating Systems of the Computers have lovely User Friendly interfaces to make even Macs burn with envy et al. But well, perhaps , I am too much complaining.

John McClane is supposed to be like this,and so is Die Hard. The amount of hair on Willis' scalp has seen a downward trend , but the action, the charisma and the power of John McClane has been sailing the skies. The chemistry between the Brute and the Brains in the movie clicked, and well , I do miss the Rupa Banyan Look of John McClane, but I am happy about one thing and that is, the Geeks/Techies have still a way with the ladies... :P
My Rating: 3 on 5

Surf's Up!

2007-06-17T05:59:00.000-07:00

Fantastic Four:Rise of the Silver Surfer. I don't know who made this movie, except for the fact that Stan Lee has been having cameos in almost all the Superhero Movies lately. Just as I had started getting cozy in my seat , I could see the fast turning of pages of Marvel Comics, and of course the Trademark 20th Century Fox Studios Opening. Okay, I don't need to go that level of detail. The point is, with movies like Fantastic Four, or X-Men or Spiderman, we do not expect Award-winning performances. All we expect is money-worth entertainment and trust me, I got more than just that.

Silver Surfer delivers every bit of it and much more. The plot ain't very complex and any child would be able to predict what would happen next. Something that looks like a meteor is flying all over the world, confounding weather patterns. In Japan, the sea turns to ice, and snow falls over the pyramids in Egypt. Electricity goes out all over Los Angeles, and everywhere this energy ball goes, it creates craters. It's strange enough that people start thinking this might be the end of the world. Come to think of it, that's not a bad guess.Meanwhile, everything is cozy with the Fantastic Four. Mr.Fantastic is about to get married to Elasti-girl(is it?). The Thing is happily engaged to his blind love and the Torch is enjoying the life of a New York bachelor.They are urban dwellers, like all superheroes, and so when Reed and Sue opt for an outdoor wedding, they hold it on a rooftop. Or maybe they do this out of plot convenience.

Before the rings are exchanged, the meteor flies by -- only, on closer look, it's not a meteor. It's a silver man on a silver surfboard, who looks like an Oscar statuette in motion. He has access to a seemingly unstoppable supply of energy, and he's sowing destruction everywhere.The actions involved are definitely noteworthy and enjoyable, and well the transformation is spellbounding and very easy on the eyes. What can I say, the illusion is done!

Von Doom shows up, like someone too mean to die, oozing menace and that very word called "kamina-pan"(English is too fancy a language to have a synonym to it).There are oblique attempts at making the film topical: For example, the Army brings in a torturer to interrogate an alien, because the alien has no "human" rights. Anyway, where was I? Yeah, I was here to praise the movie, so here I go. Its all about popcorn and edge of the seat action sequences. The ones which should be mentioned:battle between the Torch and the Silver Surfer,battle in London, which endangers the Millennium Wheel, to the outer-space scenes,and the ultimate climax in which a creeping darkness threatens to cover the earth.

At 92 mins, its much crispier than the previous average attempt on the Marvel franchise, and of course to a huge extent a better one.Well, to say more, Jessica Alba has definitely stopped doing that thing she did throughout the previous "Fantastic Four" movie. You know, that thing in which she'd speak a line and then look around nervously to see if she'd fooled anybody? Alba doesn't do that anymore. She's just fine now -- and so is the new "Fantastic Four" movie.To say that "Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer" is better than the original isn't enough.

Of course :FF3 would be there. Von Doom isn't gone yet. My rating: * * * / 5

Sugar Free

2007-06-07T01:38:00.000-07:00

Adman R.Balki's directorial debut "Cheeni Kum" is ,as the name suggests, less on sugar-coated entertainment and high on satire, unlike mainstream Bollywood cinema, and for a change, treats the audience maturely, which is a welcome change , by not spoon feeding every detail about the characters, their relations, and their emotions . Cheeni Kum tells us a story about Budhha( Amitabh Bachhan) , a perfectionist chef of Spice 6, an authentic Indian restaurant in London. Budhha takes pride in his eye for details, and in his work, and also claims his restaurant to be the best and the most authentic Indian restaurant, unlike other fake ones, which serve Indian food, directly copied from Indian recipe books.

Budhha lives with his old mother(Zohra Sehgal), has a deep affection for his 8 year old neighbour whom he calls Sexy, and his life sums up between his restaurant and his home. The main plot starts when Budhha is challenged by a customer, who sends back Hyderabadi Zaffrani Pulao back to the kitchen, complaining it to be "sweeter" than it should be. Buddha offended by the act, goes up to the table , and says that his recipe is authentic , and rudely tells the customer to ask their parents back home in India about the recipe of Zaffrani Pulao. The customer here, is Neena(Tabu), who is very much offended, and to prove her point, sends back a plate of Zaffrani Pulao, the next day. Buddha discovers that the fault was of his chef, and to apologise to his customer, asks her out for dinner.

But Buddha is so much surrounded by his own ego and self-righteousness, that he fails to say " I am sorry". What begins as a bittersweet acquaintance between Buddhadev and Neena soon transforms into mutual attraction and love blooms . Meanwhile, Budhha's mom keeps nagging to him about joining the gym. The irony in 'Cheeni Kum' is that the romance and the love angle between the main characters is often met with the contrasting story line of the tragic leukemia patient Sexy who keeps asking Budhha to bring A-rated DVDs. Budhha and and Neena finally decide to get married , but circumstances forces Neena to get back to India.

This leaves Budhha with no choice , but to ask Neena's father's (Paresh Rawal) permission for them to get married. The catch here is, Neena's diabetic father is 6 years younger to Budhha, and the eternal struggle between the two and how they come to terms, is what forms the second half of the movie.

R.Balki's treatment with the entire narration of the plot is absolutely fresh, almost something unseen in Hindi cinema. The satire, specially with the Sardar chemist, " Chacha ko Chatree Chahiye" was well thought of which left the entire audience roaring with laughter. Of course, not to forget, the dentally challenged waiter with his wonderful rendition of " Hyderabadi Zaffrani Pulao", and also his categorisation of chatree as" dotted,ribbed, strawberry, banana..et al". The movie is filled with likeable moments like the ones when Tabu discovers that Budhha is a vegetarian and calls him "Ghaas Poos", and in return Budhha calls her "Tangdee Kabab". But well, some scenes could have been done away with , like the Tree Chase scene, and well, the subsequent scenes that followed, where Bachhan tries to pursue Tabu to "do it". I mean, c'mon, who are we kidding? Mr.Bachhan , you are a wonderful actor, but you are no Kevin Spacey, or Al Pacino. Please act your age, and remain a respectable role , and please do not show us shades of Sexy Sam. It almost disgusts me sometimes. Paresh Rawal as the Gandhian diabetic is just ok. We have seen much better performances from him, so this is just passable. Tabu as Neena is nothing brilliant nor ordinary. The role seemed to easy for her in fact. The only character that made a deep impact on me , was Zohra Sehgal's .

It was such a wonderful protrayal, especially in the scene when Neena reveals that she wants to get married to Budhha. The smile on her face, and the way she says," Do din Gym gaya to usse tu mila hai."( He just went to the gym for two days, and he got you. )And of course the scene at Qutub Minar, when she starts singing a Bhangra number filled with claps and merry making. Simply brilliant. Swini Khara, however as Sexy comes across to me as the extra smart, Sayanee Ladkee who has riped before age. I just do not like such kids, who know their meta physics before revising their rhymes. Illayaraja's comeback score of the movie is very easy on ears, but that is it. The title track "Cheeni Kum hai..Cheeni Kum hai.." keeps lingering every now and then, and you start thinking, whether your ears are echoing or is it that the filmmakers did actually put it in the soundtrack.

All in all, R.Balki's "Cheeni Kum" is praise-worthy for its overall entertainment value, its wonderful writing, and its narration. I will wind up with 3 out of 5.Check it out at a theatre near you. If not, wait for the DVD to be out soon.

Life In A Metro

2007-05-13T06:27:00.000-07:00

Jab Mile Thodi Fursat, Mujhse Kar Le Mohabbat. That is what the movie is crying out , and you will love the movie. Of course, it is a very lovable movie. And it does not get lost in the crowd of the many multi-cast, multi-story driven movies of recent Bollywood , all of which bombed at the Box Office. Metro is definitely in the safe hands of diro Anurag Basu.The film begins, and you know it , you smell that you are going to like the movie. So what is there to like about LIAM(Life in a Metro)? Almost everything. One point at a time, shall we?

The Plot: It is nothing new or original, in the sense, this is what we might get to read in one of those Metro tabloids of how infidelity, extramarital and premarital sex is totaly overloading the metropolitan lives. So, as far as the plot is concerned, I can pretty much sum it up saying, everyone here wants to get laid. Ok, seriously , the story revolves around 9 characters.

Homemaker Shikha(Shilpa Shetty) and Ranjeet(Kay Kay) are married and have a 6 year old daughter. Their marriage is on the rocks, but still Shikha tries to keep things going until she finds solace in the arms of a stranger Akash(Shiney Ahuja). Shikha's sister Shruti(Konkona Sen) is almost 30 and still unmarried and is desperately seeking for her someone special and ends up meeting Monty(Irrfan Khan) who is also searching for his perfect one on marriage portals.

Ranjeet on the other hand is having an extramarital performance with Neha(Kangana Ranaut) who works in his office, a relation which can be best termed as mutually exploitative. Caught in the drama is Rahul(Sharman Joshi) who is willing to do anything to climp up the corpo ladder of success. He even offers his apartment's keys to his philandering bosses as a quick way to climp up that very ladder. And well of course, Shivani ( Nafisa Ali) and Amol (Dharmendra) who want to come back together to rekindle their lost age-old love.
Performances:Kay Kay Menon comes across as the epitome of Indian male chauvinism and well that is what Diro Basu would have wanted it to be. He plays it so perfectly, that sometimes he starts appearing as the Green Goblin. ( Secret Revealed: I have been drawing parallels between the two: Spidey 3 and LIAM, and you know what, I liked LIAM more than Spidey.Primarily because, the drama here is better and Shilpa is much sexier than ageing Kirsten Dunst )

Shilpa Ooh Shetty. She has come a long way now, of course from London's Leicester Square Premiere of the movie. But seriously, leave aside Big Brother, and that "kiss" with Mr.Gere. Shilpa wooes on the big screen. I love her Sari, I love the way she fights with Mr.Menon and I love the scene where Shiney urges her to succumb to desire, and Shilpa responds with utter confusion ,remorse and emotional outburst. Shiney Ahuja, a well polished actor , hasn't been put to much use in the movie. Sharman Joshi is very likeable as Rahul and the initial scenes between him and his neighbour Doctor just crack you up. Kangana Ranaut has very less to say, but well she must be happy with the role she got to play. Because in the silence of Neha, is what her inner tumoil comes out best.

But the crown goes to Irrfan Khan and Konkona Sen for giving the most enjoyable moments of the movie, especially the one at the beach, when Monty cries like a baby over the thought of his wife not allowing him to see Shruti.And well, the dialogue that follows after " Gaadi Nikalo, Chance Leke Dekho". Although Dharmendra's intro scene is a very likeable one, when he crosses the railway tracks to meet Nafisa Ali, the story of the two gets a bit sluggish , and even a bit unreal at a certain point when they elope on a stolen bike. I mean, where has the sugar problem and the arthritis disappeared? But then, it would be almost like nitpicking on such a loveable movie.

Diro Anurag Basu has proved it that cinema is indeed a director's medium. Crisp editing, lovely narration and a brilliant soundtrack from Pritam. LIAM has it all. But well, I have some complaints too. 1: Why was James featured in Alvida, even when KK's version in the album is so much better?2: Why Pritam playbacked on In Dino, even when Soham has sung the song and he features on the TV Promos?3. Why does the band need to feature in every song?I mean it is ok if it is one, acceptable if its two, but all the songs.C'mon, give me a break from Electric Guitars flying in the Rain, to James posing in his ancient constipated hairy look and that other guy doing " i-dunno-what" on his "i-dunno-what".

Bobby Singh's cinematography is impeccable. From the cosy scene of the dingy apartment where Shiney and Shilpa get intimate in almost no light,only lit up by the street red neon, to the skyline reflecting from the glass window pane of Sharman's apartment as Kay Kay and Kangna lean back , covered in white satine,and of course the red umbrella in the middle of the Mumbai Rain, the visuals are as they say eye-candy. Pritam, a very good job. In Dino is the song you will get tired of singing , but you will get back to it yet again. Alvida-umm, KK's version is so cool. And so are the other songs in the soundtrack. The movie certainly has its share of loopholes , but the soundtrack more than makes up for it. All in all, a good entertainer in a long long while.

Bravo!!!! 3 and a Half Stars

Bad Spidey

2007-05-13T05:12:00.000-07:00

Still struggling to get over the hangover of my last torturous tryst with the Big Screen, I was expecting a better date with the Friendly Neigbourhood guy in the Blue and Red Speedo. I have actually grown on an overdose of Stan Lee's creation right from the days of the Amazing Fantasy to the many renditions of the imaginative world of the Spiderman by different authors. It had been a thumb rule in the world of Hollywood Cinema that a comic book movie would always land up being like a Joel Schumacher's cheap treat of the Dark Knight. All that changed when Spidey swinged to the tunes of Sam Raimi .

The first Spidey movie had the innocence of a nerdy high-school teenager who wants to be cool, just discovering the comfort of getting rid of his carbon frames and also defying gravity at the same time. Clubbed with first love in an upside-down fantasy kiss in the middle of a dark Manhattan Street still wet with the rain, and of course serious ass-kicking action scenes against the very green and very evil Goblin. Spidey one was my favourite Superhero Movie.

Not until Spidey 2 came out. Spidey now was dealing the real evils of reality of making both ends meet, juggling his time to save the world along with delivering pizza , and also getting enough sleep to wake up and prepare for the next lecture's assignments. Simultaneously, our hero had to deal with his love, Mary Jane slipping away , as she demanded more attention. Oh, I forgot to mention, Alfred Molina's wonderful portrayal of Spidey's nemesis Dr.Octavius. Spiderman 2 had it all, in exactly perfect doses making it a brilliant recipe, in fact a real treat. When Spidey-3's teasers got released on the internet last fall,you know what kind of excitement it generated in the minds of people like me, a whole generation of people like me who swear on the Marvels of Marvel and DC. And then to add to the franchise, the wallpapers and the online streaming of trailers revealing that this time around , its gonna be not one, not two, but three separate baddies fighting against our Spidey. It was getting really heated. So heated up, that when I could not get the tickets to the Saturday's shows , I cursed everyone around. Not to mention, I went ahead and read the spoilers at wikipedia.com. But still, my spirits were all high and my eyes grounded on the screen as I entered the auditorium. Somehow, as I entered the hall, I could sense , this movie will not live up to the extremely high expectations that I had almost framed in our mind.I don't know how, but I did sense it.

The Plot:Opening scene-an unusually happy and content Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) is reveling in how well things are going for him -- his relationship with Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst) is rock solid, he's at the top of his class at the university and he's about to go from freelance status to staff photographer at The Daily Bugle.Simply put, picture perfect . But evil begins to reassert itself on several fronts.As Peter and Mary Jane gaze at the stars from their spider-web hammock overlooking the city, a modest "War of the Worlds"-like meteor crashes nearby and emits a gooey black silk that slithers and slides of its own accord.A hard-outside/soft-inside criminal ,Flint Marco(Thomas Haden Church), who turns out to have been responsible for the murder of Peter's beloved Uncle Ben, escapes from prison and, through a process that defies comprehension but is undeniably eye-catching, turns into a shape-changer named Sandman who can blow through the caverns of Manhattan or become a giant hulk with fearsome pummeling power.

And then there is Harry Osborn (James Franco), who, still blaming Spider-Man for the death of his father, decides to emulate the great green one by engineering a new designer Goblin outfit and flying board and taking to the skies to avenge his old man.Peter acquires yet another adversary in the person of Eddie Brock (Topher Grace), an aggressive street photographer who vies with Peter to capture the revelatory shot that will reveal Spider-Man for who he really is, a coup that will land the winner a full-time job from editor J. Jonah Jameson (J.K. Simmons) at the Daily Bugle. The rivalry turns into outright war when Eddie morphs into one more Marvel supervillain, the fanged Venom, whose skills eerily match those of Spidey.Early going is enlivened by a couple high-wire action sequences, a Goblin attack and especially a vertigo-inducing scene in which an out-of-control construction crane demolishes part of a nearby skyscraper, sending platinum blonde Gwen (Bryce Dallas Howard), a classmate of Peter's, heading toward the pavement, only to be saved at the last second by guess who.But the dramatic temperature is brought way down by Mary Jane, who's become a real drag. Fired, in a poor scene, from her Broadway play, she pathetically begs for attention, becomes petulant when Spidey plants a public kiss on Gwen after saving her, then seeks solace from Harry. What happens in the climax is everybody's guess: Mary Jane gets kidnapped (yet again) by the baddies, and Spidey manages to kick their asses with the help of an old (accomplice) foe. Nothing inspirational.Oh did I forget to mention, Aunt May speaking about volumes about how Ben Parker proposed to her.Yeah, I paid my ticket to see that.

The problem:The problem with most third movies in a film franchise -- be it Star Wars or The Godfather, Batman or Superman, Indiana Jones or The Matrix -- is that the primary reason for their existence is greed. It's not that the filmmakers aren't trying to make a good film. It's just that, unless you're dealing with source material rich enough to warrant three separate pictures (like The Lord of the Rings), all the best ideas have already been spent on the previous two installments.The only reason to go back, then, is to wring a few more bucks out of a proven success. This is why most part threes are, with precious few exceptions, so disappointing. Spiderman 3 is in fact not one of those exceptions. It repeats all the tried and tested character insights scripting done previously in Spidey 2, to an excessive extent that it becomes painful enough to bear the pain of Aunt May and ageing Mary Jane. No wonder, Peter wanted to break up with her.

Even longer than its predecessors, 3 piles on the series's usual comedy scenes and action sequences while adding some black slime from outer space and a few new actors (Thomas Haden Church, Topher Grace) to the more familiar faces (Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco, J.K. Simmons, Rosemary Harris). And a pile is what it feels like, especially when two superheroes ultimately join forces to defeat three supervillains. Given how bogus the movie is whenever it departs from formula, it's not surprising that the funniest bit (in which Peter Parker becomes a disco smoothie) is stolen from Jerry Lewis's The Nutty Professor or that the best special effects, involving a gigantic Sandman, dimly echo King Kong. Director Sam Raimi tries to pump some life into this dutiful enterprise but seems more than a little bored himself, especially when he's getting mushy about Spider-Man's moral decline and regeneration. It feels like the end of Sam Raimi’s big-screen comic-book adaptations. (Ready or not, the studio is talking about a fourth.) Aesthetically and conceptually wrung out, fizzled rather than fizzy, this latest installment in the spider-bites-boy adventure story shoots high, swings low and every so often hits the sweet spot, but mostly just plods and plods along, as if its heart were pumping tired radioactive blood.Maybe it’s middle age.

In fictional terms Spider-Man a k a Peter Parker a k a Tobey Maguire looks like he’s pushing 23, but there’s something about the guy that shrieks midlife crisis. Peter is still hitting the books and still snapping photographs for The Daily Bugle, run by the flattop blowhard J. Jonah Jameson (J. K. Simmons, in clover, as usual). It’s a living, kind of, enough for an enviably situated dump in Manhattan with artfully peeling walls and a fabulous picture window through which Peter regularly bounds into the air in full superhero drag. (The neighbors in this part of town evidently always keep the blinds drawn.) It’s a calling, sort of, though it’s also started to feel a bit like punching the clock.
The programmatic screenplay credited to Mr. Raimi, his brother Ivan Raimi (a third Raimi brother, Ted, plays a tiny role in the picture) and Alvin Sargent certainly feels more like work than play. The only selling point in “Spider-Man 3” is that Spider-Man or Peter or some combination of the two discovers his so-called dark side when an inky extraterrestrial glob (a symbiote in Marvel-speak) spreads its gooey tentacles over his body, turning his suit and soul black. Though there’s something dubious about the idea that black still conveys evil in our culture, pop or otherwise (tell it to Batman and Barack Obama, for starters), the idea of messing with Spider-Man’s squeaky-clean profile, smearing it with dirt, a touch of naughtiness, seems too good to resist. I would have loved to see a bit more of Spidey-the Dark Man, or shall we call him Peter Darker. May be , he could end up killing Gwen or Mary Jane perhaps, rather than playing the piano or grooving to the Jazz.

But then, having said enough of how Spidey 3 did not meet much of my expectations, people at Sony have the cash bells ringing continuously, without giving a shit about what the critics say.Left dangling for the past three years, arachnophiles everywhere finally have cause to celebrate.
The biggest (with a production budget due north of $250 million) and longest (clocking in at 139 minutes) and quite possibly the capper of a trilogy featuring the current talent lineup, "Spider-Man 3" has done it again.Certain to please the geek squad by remaining ever true to its comic book roots while retaining that satisfying emotional core that has registered with equal numbers of female fans, "Spider-Man 3" has all its demographic bases covered.Having already received its world premiere in Tokyo in a nod to piracy concerns, "Spider-Man 3" premiered in a good portion of the globe ahead of its May 4 North American bow. And the opening weekend collection is a worldwide highest breaking the feat of POTC-Dead Man's Chest.

Factor in those additional Imax screens, and the Columbia Pictures blockbuster should spin a worldwide web that should build substantially on the $1.6 billion already brought in by the first two installments.And so , it doesn't matter if Spidey got a little way too much emotional on this one, and Aunt May was high on her Prozac,neither if Mary Jane desperately needs some face lift, as far as the cash is flowing, Spidey 4 is very much on the cards. Early speculations: Carnage could be the next villain.My Rating: 3 out of 5, just for the extra-cool, hyper special effects worth 250 million $. Money speaks.

Era-gon(e)

2007-04-29T05:41:00.000-07:00

Extremely depressed after a long,working week, Friday Evening was the time when I had to go and watch a movie and unfortunately , there were no other tickets available for me other than for Eragon.What can I say?It is movies like Eragon which are made, to make one realise that high budget Hollywood Special Effects can also fall flat on the face. It sets an example of how exactly movies ,should not be made.No matter how much bucks you thrown into, you definitely can end up creating absolute crap if you don't have the craft.

George Lucas' Six Star Wars, Peter Jackson's LOTR Trilogy, and well the four Harry Potter Movies. After being a witness to all these fantasy movies (some masterpieces like the Return of the Jedi and LOTR-Return of the King, and some not so much -the Harry Potter Series), when I am subjected to such a big screen torture for almost two hours , I cannot help but cry. Cry out loud,"those are the two hours of my life gone wasted".If you are still wondering what is there to complain about the movie,well, let us go the other way round by jotting down what I actually liked about the movie. To start with the name of the Dragon "Saphira". Sounds much like Shakira, but more elegant and well, sounds somewhat related to Sapphire. Whats next? Umm, the beautiful outdoor locations and spellbounding aerial shots of Hungary. It did remind of the New Zealand of LOTR.That's it.That is all I liked about the movie.

Everything else in the movie was completely ordinary to pathetic at times. The narrative-slow, the dialogues- could have been written by me in a much better way, I guess.I could have spiced up the movie by giving it a touch of Tenacious D in the script. The actors, do not get me started on that. And I do not care if it is based upon some fantasy bestseller by some Paolini. I demand an explanation for making such talents like Djimon Hounsou, Jeremy Irons and Robert Carlyle all gone waste.As far as Rachel Weisz's voice is concerned , it is not very recognisable like Cate Blanchett's(LOTR, remember).

No wonder, when we entered the theatre, the torch guy said, "Sit anywhere Sir, the hall is yours". Me and my friend, chose our seats. From reel 1 to the end, my friend demanded, " Yaar!! c'mon show me a kiss at least". Because there was nothing else that could rescue our Friday evenings. He would frequently comment " Bloody , ek dhang ki bandee nahi hai movie main, itna paisa kaha kharch kiya, aur naa hi ek kiss dikhaya, at least LOTR main Liv Tyler last main ek mast wala kiss to deti hai". What can I say? Some people do have complaints that neither IMDB nor Rotten Tomatoes would register.

Rating: I wish I could give it a negative rating. But because of the Visual Hungary Tourism Brochure, I m gonna give it a 1. But it came to me for 140 bucks. Screw it. Minus 5. Wanna still watch it?

Index of Movies

2007-04-20T03:25:00.000-07:00

Here is the List of all that I have written about in Magnum Opus.

Aaja Nachle
Om Shanti Om
Jab We Met
Superbad
RGV ki AAG
ScreenFixed 2
Monsoon Wedding
Dil Dosti etc.
Johnny Gaddar
Loins of Punjab Presents
Transformers
Ratatouille
ScreenFixed
Die Hard 4
Fantastic Four :Rise of the Silver Surfer
Cheeni Kum
Life in a Metro
Spiderman 3
Eragon
Little Miss Sunshine
Bheja Fry
NameSake
300
Pick of Destiny
Water
Apocalypto
Dhoom 2
Bhagam Bhaag
Casino Royale
Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna
Rang De Basanti
King Kong
Hazaron Khwahishein Aisi
Harry Potter :Goblet of Fire
Parineeta

Little Miss Sunshine

2007-04-18T05:32:00.000-07:00

I smiled, I laughed , I cried, I shouted and I enjoyed the bumpy ride of the rickety yellow Volkswagen, as dysfunctional as the Hoovers themselves. Little Miss Sunshine is "the Indie Movie" this year and it is no surprise that it was a front contender at the Oscars , only to lose to Scorsese's the Departed. Right from the starting titles to the end credit rolls, Little Miss Sunshine ( hereafter referred to as LMS) is such a blast and so openhearted and obsessed with winning like its characters, and it does win a lot of hearts in the way to the Redondo Beach.

As Devotchka's background score plays on,we are introduced to Olive who aspires to win the LMS pageant and practices hours in front of the TV imitating the plastic American Beauties, trained under her Heroine Sniffing, Porn Reading,grumpy old Grandpa played by Alan Arkin in his Oscar winning role. Dwayne(Paul Dano), Olive's elder step Brother aspires to become a Pilot and has taken a vow of silence and trains himself rigorously for it. Dwayne's hero is the 19th century German philospher Friedrich Nietzsche.And then there is the father of the family ,Richard, who seeks his big break as the lead spokesman of his own self help program "9 steps to success". Toni Collete plays Sheryl , the mother who is herself very much troubled handling her work, her dysfunctional family, and now her brother Frank, who almost committed suicide. Frank (Steve Carell) is the country's leading Proust Scholar and is terminally depressed over losing his lover.

The opening few minutes reveal how the characters, inspite of belonging to the same family (almost) are so very much scattered and disjointed and how everyone is just living for the sake of it- as most people would say, a true portrayal of today's American Life or as many critics might call it as the attack on the way Americans shape their lives around reaching for the brass ring;to me its a celebration of the same phenomenon. The dinner table scene is one of the many high points in the movie. Dinner here, means chicken and Sprite and for dessert everyone has ice-cream.What gets you laughing and believing in the characters is the way they eat together. When Sheryl brings home a big takeout bucket, Grandpa erupts, "What is this?! Chicken?! Every day it's the chicken! Holy God Almighty! Is it possible, just one time, we could have something for dinner except the goddamn chicken?!"

Still, they're all sitting around the table having dinner; even silent Dwayne sets the table. Though they may be drinking out of fast-food giveaway glasses, they're eyeing each other as a family. When Olive wants to know why Uncle Frank has been so unhappy, her question sets off the kind of electric ripple that floats through families and unifies them even as it shocks or tickles them. Her dad, Richard, panics, but Olive asks, "You fell in love with a boy?" Frank answers, "Very much so." And Olive responds, lightly, adorably, "That's silly." ("There's another word for it," says Grandpa.) The movie is about the power and the glory of the makeshift, from the family's floating, changing patterns of disconnects and sympathies to the menus for its breakfast, lunch and dinner.

The Hoovers wouldn't reach their one defining moment of communion if they weren't strivers. In this odyssey, what's more dangerous than the whirlpools of ambition are the shallows of rigid thinking. Every step to Redondo Beach requires a leap or push - everyone needs to get out and shove the spluttering VW before it can move into high gear. Richard achieves salvation in the family's eyes when he imparts his get-ahead drive to Olive's heart's desire, even if it turns them into temporary outlaws getting a narrow escape from a libidinous cop. Frank begins to apply Proustian wisdom by helping, of all people, hard-bodied Dwayne. Without giving anything crucial away, let's just say that by the time this family reaches the Little Miss Sunshine contest, there's no question who's "normal," and it's not Olive's freakily toned little-girl competitors or the wholesome clans cheering them on.

The cast is so perfect that it's impossible to imagine anyone else in the roles. Arkin's spontaneity gives the impression that he's improvising. Kinnear embodies the hyped-up energy of a gambler sure his next card will beat the house. He and Collette effectively use body language to convey the frustrations of a couple trying to hold it together for the kids. The two have almost no physical contact. A scene where they verbally lash out at each other is particularly well acted. Even in such heady company, Carell, whose success in "The 40 Year Old Virgin" established him as more than just a television face, comes close to making this his movie. His well-honed comic instincts are evident in the way Frank intently follows the family's disjointed conversations with his eyes -- as if watching a tennis match -- and in his quickened pace to get to the pageant registration desk when the Hoovers, delayed by one crisis after another, arrive in Redondo Beach late.

Abigail Breslin , who plays Olive is a revelation--she brings an unstudied, unsaccharine sweetness with her enchanting, chubby , bespectacled smile .She is endearingly attentive and captures the infinite fascination of the genuinely innocent. It could have easily gone wrong in every possible way, but it does not. The perennially underrated Greg Kinnear is astounding as Richard. Even when you fear he'll be the creepy, controlling dad, Kinnear imparts the sadness of a family man who's also aching to be a man of the world and doesn't know how. Kinnear turns the disappointments of a self-help salesman into arias of comic pathos. When he takes command of his clan, it's by owning his own failures and seeing his own ambitions and letdowns in Olive and in Dwayne. Paul Dano as Dwayne gives the crowning performance in the improbably magical saga of the Hoovers, who in the end suck up all the humanity from a room filled mostly with Sun Belt humanoids. Dano , who even after remaining mute for the major part of the movie, speaks volumes with his silence. And when he speaks out loud , everyone listens.

There's no more fitting final destination than California, the land of promise for generations of families seeking to improve their lot. But "Little Miss Sunshine" is really more about getting there. You'll be delighted, if a bit breathless from laughing, to be along for the ride.You won't see a brighter, truer affirmation of the All-American messed-up improvisational family than Little Miss Sunshine. Dazzling Sunshine, not little in any way.

Half Baked!

2007-04-16T04:31:00.000-07:00

Usually, I do care about the cast of a movie when I go to watch it, and also that there are no signs of even a minute's appearance of Himmesss or his "music". Debutante director Sagar Ballary's Indian Take on the French Comedy "The Dinner Game","Bheja Fry" did not pose any high expectations and star values, but it did have my favourite actors set, Vinay Pathak and Ranvir Shorey and to top it, Tej Bhaisaab (Monsoon Wedding), I mean Rajat Kapoor. I went to look for a good Sunday Morning entertainer and entertain it did, in pure Bhaiya isshtyle.

Vinay Pathak rules in every inch of the reel he occupies and that is the movie's strength as well as the weekness.At almost 2 hours , Bheja Fry tells us the story of a Music Industry Guy ,Ranjit Thadani (Rajat Kapoor)who has a weird hobby of having dumb performers entertain them on Friday Nights. Only this time, he comes across Bharat Bhushan (Vinay Pathak), whom he mistakes to be yet another dumb guy. I am tempted to tell you the plot, but well I'll keep that for you to explore.As the name suggests, Vinay literally fries every inch of your neurons and your cranium and makes you roar you with laughter with his performance. Well, having said that, I must say, that after a while it did seem to me that the entire movie had been overloaded on Vinay Pathak's shoulders. I am not saying that he is not capable of doing that. I am just saying that it looked a bit obvious and not quite natural after a while. Unlike "Khosla Ka Ghosla" where the entire spectrum of performances were explored from Boman, to Ranvir to Anupam Kher to Vinay Pathak and even the so brief Vinod Nagpal in Mr.Sahni's role. Well ,you can say that I am perhaps nitpicking by comparing the two. In a way yes, I am , because I liked Khosla a lot, but Bheja Fry remains to me a movie which I liked or rather laughed at in bits.

Talking about the performances, though Bheja Fry has in the castlist actors like Ranvir Shorey,Milind Soman and Saarika , there is hardly any credibility in their acts. Especially Ranvir who seems like an unpaid actor to me in a role that can be said to be having proximity to the gags he performs on the Great Indian Comedy show. Saarika is wasted and well, Milind Soman can only converse and well talk on the phone.

But the man of the movie (You'll hear this almost 167 times in movie reviews)is Vinay Pathak. From his irritating unpacking of his Scrapbook to the suspicious look on his face when he puts in the number combo on his briefcase, he looks so very natural. Some really memorable moments like when Bharat Bhushan calls Anand as a Bhojpuri Film Producer by the alias of Madan Mohan for a movie " Humar Bhojai Tohar Lugai" and suggests that the movie would star Ravi Kishan jee, Nagma Jee and Rahul Roy jee , just cracked the entire audience. And so was the scene when Miss Suman Rao keeps asking the meaning of a word that Ranjeet has been using to describe her. Also not to forget, when Asif calls up his wife who's in the middle of an adulterous tryst to tell her he knows what she's upto. It's really moments like these that you'll remember even after you've left the cinema, but then you'll remember only the moments, not the movie as a whole. So all said and done, I give Bheja Fry 2.5 out of 5 . Half Baked stuff for me- delicious ,but only at some portions .

Namesake

2007-03-24T11:31:00.000-07:00

I remember Mira Nair's "Monsoon Wedding" vividly. Though I am no resident of Delhi or as they call it "Delhite" , Monsoon Wedding gave me the smell of the tea at the "Tapdee" of Connaught place, the hustle and rickshaws in Purani Dilli, the chuskis and Wedding Bazars of Chandni Chowk and of course the Rain drenched Skies of the Capital. I walk in the theatre and as the reels of "The Namesake" start to roll, I am given a different treat this time around. It is Kolkata or rather , Calcutta of the late 70s. The trams, the ghats, the Maajhis, the processions , the red flags , the chants of "jindabad jindabad" and the gullies. It's all captured and you can smell it. And well, I must say, I am not a Bong, neither do I belong to Kolkata.

Spoiler Warnings: If you haven't seen the movie, the movie details might be revealed. But I can't help mention the story.

"The Namesake" begins with the story of Ashok Ganguly(Irrfan Khan) at Howrah Station(I guess), who on his way to Jam(Shedpur), meets an accident while he was reading a book by Nikolai Gogol. He survives and this incident leaves a deep impact on his mind. Ashok becomes a PhD in New York in fibre optics.He gets married to Ashima(Tabu) in pure Indian arranged marriage isshtyle. Following the wedding, they move to America, and Ashima ,leaving behind the warm, familiar climate of Calcutta, must adjust to life in New York in winter. Lonely, cold and depressed, Ashima nonetheless does her best to make her way in her new home, as she learns to love her new husband. She has her first breakfast with Kellog's and salted peanut's, just how (Mira)Nair treats us with details about Ashima's efforts to adjust with a place far away from home.We get muted emotions portrayed with so much finesse when it comes to the love of the newly wed couple,who show their love in very subtle ways. The Gangulys are blessed with a son, whom they have to hurriedly name Gogol( the accident and "the Overcoat" connection). The Gangulys eventually move to the suburbs and are friends with other Pravasi Bengalis who try to create a home like atmosphere away from home by having the occasional traditional ceremonies and also participate in each other's family events like Naamkarans of the newborn.
Plot 2 begins when Gogol(Kal Penn) grows up to find that he has been named after tragic 19th Century Russian writer Nikolai Gogol, a topic on which he is often picked upon. Gogol is rebellious, listens to Pearl Jam, Americanised and is caught in the cultural divide. Ashima is taken aback by some of her children's Westernisms, she's never anything less than polite. Ashok wants to tell his son why he was named Gogol , but is hesitant. Meanwhile, Gogol goes ahead and changes his name to Nikhil. On their trip back home to India, Gogol discovers the city of Calcutta. The ATMS have arrived, but the rickshaw pullers are still there. Somethings haven't changed. Ashima decides upon a family trip to the Taj Mahal at Agra. Gogol is blown away by the beauty of Mughal Architecture and decides to opt for an Architecture Major at Yale. Gogol becomes established as an architect working at the Big Apple, and has a relationship with an American Girl Maxie. Gogol spends more time with his girlfriend and her parents, hardly calls his parents and Ashima silently complains. We get to see more glimpses of the cultural divide, when Gogol instructs Maxie what not to do when they go to visit his parents.On their visit home, Ashok finally tells him the significance of the name "Gogol", of how he survived the accident while he was reading "the Overcoat". He tells how the voice of the other traveller echoed in his ears saying " pack your bags and go abroad..". That is why he chose to move to America. Gogol questions Ashok if he is reminded of that incident everytime he thinks of him.Ashok replies that Gogol reminds him of everything that happened after that, of how everything after that has been " a miracle" for him. You see the tenderness, the strength, the composure and the breakdown in Ashok's moist eyes. Gogol moves ahead to New York, away from his folks.Ashok gets a semester contract to teach at Ohio, where he meets a heart attack and passes away. Ashima is left alone, stranded, and lost. Gogol ,when faced with the tragedy of losing his Baba, regrets,his heart aches and he wishes if he could turn back time and appreciate his father when he was alive.
Plot3: Gogol finally realises his own indentity, shedding off the American skin, and shaving off his head. The family reunites to go back to India to immmerse the ashes of his late father.By this time, Gogol has broken up with Maxie. Ashima tries to hitch up Gogol with another Bengali girl, Moushumi. Gogol and Moushumi get married only to discover that they are two absolutely different individuals who want different things and perhaps different partners in case of Moushumi. Ashima finally decides to move back to India, sell her home in America and persuade learning Indian Classical Music. One of the most moving scenes for me in the movie is when Gogol goes back to his old room and finds the Book gifted to him by his Baba on his graduation day, a book by Gogol with the note written, "Gogol, for the man who gave you his name, from the man who gave you your name". Gogol tells his mother, that inspite of the fact that everyone is leaving ,when he should feel very upset about it, he rather feels liberated and free and finally has understood his Baba's lines "We all come out from under Gogol's Overcoat."

The Performances:

Tabu to me has not enacted but lived Ashima Ganguly and breathes the character following a path of subtle changes as she progresses from a blushing bride to a middle aged widow.With incredible subtlety, Tabu ages Ashima from period to period, carving character without dialogue, playing the scenes as much between the lines as through them. Give her all the awards.

Ashok played by Irrfan Khan, brilliant!!!! The depiction of a Bong , without ridiculing the accent, and the internal turmoil that he faces in expressing his affection for his son has been perfectly portrayed. The silent grace and dignity that reflects in Ashok's character has been brilliantly brought to life by Khan, and his nobility lingers throughout the movie even after the character's demise.

Kal Penn ,kudos.He perfectly captures the essence of the so-called ABCD(American Born Confused Desi), and brings to life, the plight and the pain of being an ABCD until he finally finds his own identity. We get to see the growth in his character as the growth of his hair follows a negative trend :P

The Masters:
The incense of Nitin Sawhney's Score.
Jhumpa Lahiri, the writer of the Book. Khade Ho Jaaiye aur taali Bajaaiye.She also has a cameo role in the movie, in the scene of Gogol's younger sister's naming ceremony.
Frederick Elmes cinematography.Impeccable.Perfect in depicting 1970s and 1990s Calcutta, as well as the lonely winters,the dark rooms, the green suburbs and the utterly metropolitan America.
Sooni Taraporevala,the scriptwriter and Mira Nair,the Director.Both have been more than successful in bringing "Namesake" to life.Like the Gangulis, Nair stands between the two cultures, and here she knits them together, by shuttling between two continents and shows the similarities--their massive bridges, crowded buildings, and streets teeming with people and also the obvious differences.

She strikes deep personal chords resonating with the stories of those millions of Pravasi Indians living in a home away from home.Nair's approach to details--a pause,unspoken words speaking volumes,a touch, a caress,details in the crowd makes "Namesake" one of the most riveting, touching and a very personal movie experience.

300: Prepare for G(L)ORY

2007-03-16T23:56:00.000-07:00

When they say comics are for kiddos, I say, grow Up. 300 is definitely not for the Kids. When Frank Miller's "Dark Knight" series of Batman Adaptation hit stores almost 20 years ago, the whole theory of comics aiming at low brow entertainment got changed. It is 2007, and a whole new school of film making replicates the visual spectacle of Frank Miller's Graphic Novel "300" and WHAT A SPECTACLE it is indeed. Distilled to its essence, it is a graphic novel come to life on the celluloid-page by page, frame by frame.
The Story: Its 480 BC, and Spartan King Leonidas is faced with the problem: 200,000 Persians approaching Greece led by King Xerxes. Leonidas cannot submit to Xerxes' reign as a true free person and as a true Spartan King. The Spartan council is reluctant to send the entire army, since their oracle has informed them that they can’t win. Leonidas however, manages to "go for a stroll" with his bodyguards comprising of "300" handpicked Spartans and marches to the coast to meet the invaders. His plan is to force the Persian's in the narrow bottleneck known as the Hot Gates, thus stalling their advance, until his wife can plead in front of the council to send the entire army.
But well, enough being said of the story , we are here for what we are here--Testosterone Explosivo. A feast for the eyes, OTT( Over the Top) Hyperviolence, and Never Before Seen Beheadings in Leisurely SloMo with Blood Spilling all over the (Blue)Screen.Those 90 minutes are the best 90 minutes I ever had at the movies so far, which I probably had the last time when I saw Neo dodge a bullet from the Agents. So it doesn't matter to me if Zack Snyder's adaptation of the Battle of Thermopylae is set against racing Heavy Metal Music, or critics crying out ," 300 dazzles as spectacle, but as history it's dodgy". Leave that out. I have my eyes laid upon the roaring action, the Blue and the Green Screen, the bronze tinted Six Packs, the Blood Spilling and the Bling Bling of Xerxes. I clap when Leonidas shouts " SpaaarTannnz!!!!!!", and I jump out of the chair when a head falls. The spears flying, the arrows piercing the skin,the dark faced Immortals, the monster creatures, and an inflated "Gollum",300 has them all. Its like LOTR once again, this time on STEROIDS.So what, if it does not have the mythology of Tolkien to support, and has the Graphic Gore of Miller instead. 300 shines for me more than Xerxes' ornaments.Prepare your eyes from popping out from their sockets in the face of such SuperEnergized Visuals. Well, my friends at cinematical.com have a few words to say..

If Gladiator and Sin City had a baby, it'd look a whole lot like Zack Snyder's 300. Visually arresting and wildly cut together, 300 is (despite its well-earned R-rating) precisely the kind of movie that turns 14-year-old boys into ravenous movie geeks.

And I am dying in anticipation for its DVD release. Because for me then, I shall have the power, the power of the Remote , to rewind the bloodbath spectacle of Snyder. Haaaauuuuuu!!!!!!!!

SpaaaarTaaaNNZZZ!!!!! Enjoy your Breakfast. Tonite !!! We dine in Hell!!!!!!!!!!

5 Spears out of 5 Spears, Bang on Xerxes' Eye....

"Satan's not in a guitar pick. He's in all of us!"

2007-03-15T03:29:00.000-07:00

A movie which begins with the lines " A long ass fucking time ago..." is defintely supposed to rock hard ,isn't it? And yes it does. " Coz its the Pick of Destiny's Child,you know I will be rockin' cause it's fucking insane! And doth we know, that it is indeed fucking INSANE. Coz, its the D which comes alive with its powerful Rock and kills the Devil, and also pay their rent side by side.

For the uninitiated, Tenacious D: Pick of Destiny stars Jack Black as JB or Jables and Kyle Gass as KG or Kage , and is the story( more or less a chronicling of events ) of how the band Tenacious D was formed (more real than ever, in the words of JB) and how they become , the self-proclaimed "Greatest Band in the World".

The movie is a treat for all the D fans, but for those who haven't been so aware of their music or their HBO Television shows, it shouldn't be an obstacle for you from enjoying the movie, and also enjoying the great lyrics of the Soundtrack, right from the intro of "young JB" in Kickapoo which goes something like..

A long ass fuckin' time ago,
In a town called Kickapoo,
There lived a
humble family
Religious through and through.
But yay there was a black
sheep
And he knew just what to do.
His name was young J.B. and he
refused to step in-line.
A vision he did see-eth
Fuckin' rockin' all the
time.
He wrote a tasty jam and all the planets did align

Young JB is outrageously hilarious perfectly imitating Black's ecstasies of stagecraft and communing with the spirit of Ronnie James Dio. He runs away from home for his quest to form the world's most awesome band and he arrives at Hollywood . At Venice Beach, he meets Kage ,his Partner in Crime, Kyle Gass aka Rage Kage 5000.
Special mention: Classico. The song, featured in the movie, is an exploration of classical guitar music in aid of proving Kyle Gass's musical powers to Jack Black. In it, Gass plays sections from Bach's Bourrée in E minor (from Suite in E minor, BWV 996), Für Elise by Beethoven and Eine Kleine Nachtmusik by Mozart. Jack sings along harmoniously to Gass's guitar playing and thus proves to Lee, that Tenacious D is a viable band.(Source: wikipedia.com). And well, JB's powerful (is that the word) lyrics..

Can’t you see he’s the man, let me hear
you applaud
he is more than a man he's a shiny golden god.

If you
think its time to fucking rock, and fucking roll, out of control,
and then
you know you got to rock the block,
and fucking suck my fucking cock,
'cause when you rule, you fucking school all of the fools, out of their
jewels,
'cause if you think it’s time,
if you think it’s time,
if
you think it’s time to fucking rock.

He is going to kick your fucking
ass,
and you know his name is Kyle Gass,
rocking and fucking rolling,
and fucking rocking,
and fucking rolling

When Jables and Kage are faced with the question of paying their rent, they have to rock everyone's socks off. And so, History as they say, repeats itself, ( a song which most D fans would remember from the HBO TV Series)

We ride with kings on mighty steeds across the devil's plain
we've walked
with Jesus and his cross
he did not die in vain No!

we' ve run
with
wolves
we've climbed K2 even stopped a moving train
we've
travelled
through space and time my friends to rock this house again Rock!

Kyle's
fingers be silver
BoTH
Jack's voice then be gold
both lest you think
we're vain!

We know its the showcase and we
don't care
Tenacious D
we reign...

Black and Gass, who wrote the screenplay with director Liam Lynch, make enough room for virtually every element in D-mythology, from the band's first meeting with their number-one fan Lee (JR Reed, who played the same role on the TV series and has appeared in concert with them as well) to a hallucinatory encounter with a Sasquatch (the subject of a particularly odd Tenacious D ditty) well, which for me was the most dragging part of the entire plot. The storyline is also partially derived from one of their most famous songs, "Tribute," in which the guys are challenged by a demon to perform the Best Song in the World. The Pick of Destiny finds JB and KG in pursuit of the titular guitar pick, which, legend has it, was carved from Satan's tooth. This quest inevitably brings them into contact with the Dark Lord himself and in order to escape his clutches, they have to play--you guessed it--the Best Song in the World.
Surprise blink cameos (you know, go off in a blink) by Ben Stiller, Meatloaf, Dave Grohl,Ronney James Dio , Tim Robbins in a Captain Jack Sparrow Teeth Role, and well, who was that girl, in the role of the most miserable North American waitress role, Crotch Pushups( You read that right), Power Slides, and of course a moral to top..."Satan's not in a guitar pick. He's in all of us!"..Pick of Destiny has it all.
So I don't give it a damn what the critics say. POD won't make it to the Oscars List ever, or well not be very popular even in the main pop culture comedy already filled this year by Will Ferrell's take on NASSCAR or Sacha Baron Cohen's bout with Afghanistan's two Golden Globes (if you know what I mean....).POD is very special to me, like it is to every D fan.Jack Black Rocks , especially when he Rocks in Master Exploder, Kyle Gass what can I say, dude....yeaaaahhhhhhhhh....that was bad ...aaaaaaaassssss.....Go Now Kyle Go Now Kyle 1...2....3...Tenacious D..we reign.....Burrito Supreme... haa Chicken Supreme...

Alert: For those who are easily offended by words like fuck, crotch, cock et al, Buzz Off!!!!

What did you expect from Tenacious D?

Water

2007-03-11T05:42:00.000-07:00

I have been quite unfamiliar with the work of Deepa Mehta except for a few scenes of 1947:Earth and Bollywood/Hollywood. Well, before writing anything about the movie, I must say, it takes a hell lot of determination in completing a movie like Water which has been through so many obstacles and had run into so much troubled"water" itself. Splashed across the media for the wrong reasons,Deepa Mehta , after her first two movies in her elements trilogy, was being attacked for her third feature,Water when the shooting began in Banaras. She had to pack up everything and also face the burden of actors backing out. She was forced to return to Canada and well, she made a romantic comedy, Bollywood/Hollywood in between with Lisa Ray and Rahul Khanna in the lead. But Water needed to be made: it was a story needed to be told. Productions began in SriLanka, a compromised setting but nevertheless, Deepa Mehta succeeds in bringing the story to celluloid, or rather celluloid.

As the reels begin to roll, we witness the 8 year old Chuiya (Sarala) who has been widowed and is forcibly sent to the Vidhwa Aashram headed by the fat old Madhoo Didi(Manorama). The charm of young Chuiya and her mother-like relation with Shakuntala( Seema Biswas) and a sister-like relation with Kalyani (Lisa Ray) is what forms the core of the movie. Kalyani falls for Narayan(John Abraham), a tall, handsome, foreign-educated follower of Gandhi. But I think, the film could have done without it. The story of Kalyani remains very blurred in depiction as characters hardly talk and mostly because Lisa Ray's beauty becomes more of an obstruction to me, from sympathising or may be relating with the character( Critics say she is the most gorgeous widow to have graced the Indian celluloid ever). Seema Biswas is a wonderful actor and she brings in the angst,anxiety and desperation to full light and her efforts to rescue Chuiya ,is the only saving grace from the not-so-impressive climax. Rahman's music succeeds in bringing the effect of rain and the feel of drops on your skin with "Aayo re"(my favourite soundtrack in the movie).

You take home lots of questions and also lots of unanswered smiles. Especially, when Buaa keeps asking for Ladoos and Mithaee. Joyous moments when you smile at Kalyani and Chuiya clapping as it rains outdoors and when the entire Ashram gets colored up at Holi with "Shyam Rang " in Richa Sharma's voice plays along.

All in all, a must see for all who have been waiting for so long to lay their eyes on something really meaningful. Cinematically, it can't be called a masterpiece. But this is a movie which transcends all critic rating systems and box office figures. I conclude with something written by famous Movie Critic Roger Ebert(www.rogerebert.com)
"That a film like "Water" still has the power to offend in the year 2006 inspires the question: Who is still offended, and why, and what have they to gain, and what do they fear?"

Next up: 300

Apocalypto: Gory Gibson is Back

2007-03-11T05:15:00.000-07:00

Apocalypto is as thrilling as any adventure movie can get. It is a perfect display of the powerful story-telling expertise of Mel Gibson. Though it brings to me a traumatic flashback of a 1980's controversial exploitation feature called Cannibal Holocaust, Apocalypto triumphs in bringing in the human element and rise above the graphic gore , a feat Mr.Gibson is often associated with(post or pre Passion of the Christ).

Although the narrative has a myth-like simplicity, it doesn’t feel overextended at 138 minutes, thanks to Gibson’s ability to establish characters quickly and shape each scene in a way that creates a headlong momentum.

All the actors are unknowns, but they’re so consistently strong that they may not remain that way for long. Rudy Youngblood, a 25-year-old Native American who plays the hero, Jaguar Paw, has piercing eyes and a remarkable presence. When he’s kidnapped by another tribe, and his son and pregnant wife hide out underground, he promises he’ll return to save them. We have no reason to doubt his pledge.

Helping to establish Jaguar’s authority is a Cassandra figure, a diseased child who condemns the kidnappers with a series of ominous warnings. When they’re fulfilled, Jaguar is saved from human sacrifice, and he leads his tormentors on a merry chase that’s reminiscent of “The Naked Prey” as well as Br’er Rabbit’s tricky Briar Patch.

Gibson and his first-time co-writer, Farhad Safinia, have come up with their own vision of 15th-Century Mayan civilization, which may or may not have anything to do with historical fact, and hence many critics and anthropologists have left no stones unturned in accusing them of historical inaccuracies.

For the most part, the setting is used as the background for a series of close calls and daring feats that suggest Saturday-matinee cliffhangers rather than a serious attempt to recreate a dying Mayan culture.

The actors speak Yucatec Maya, which is translated into English subtitles that can be jarringly modern. “Move it” sounds a little odd in this context, and so does one hilarious profanity. But so little of “Apocalypto” relies on dialogue that Gibson ends up using a lot of silent-film shorthand to tell his story.

The cinematographer is the Australian Dean Semler, who won an Oscar for “Dances With Wolves” and this time uses a handheld camera to tear through the jungle in a way that’s just short of dizzying. Whenever you think he’s gone too far, he pulls back and gives you breathing space. The same could be said of Gibson’s direction, which has never seemed this smooth before.

From breathtaking visuals of Waterfalls and fast chases in the jungle,to underwater plunges and oh so bloody hearts teared upon, Apocalypto is definitely not for the weak-hearted.

My Rating:3.5 on 5

Aah : SIN CITY

2007-02-07T03:46:00.000-08:00

I have been bloggin' a lot about movies. For once, lemme grab my armchair and just relax and view the spectacle , that is Frank Miller's Sin City. A week before the worldwide release of the next Frank Miller adaptation 300, I give you ladies and gentlemen, Sin City. Enjoy.

Sin City is a bustling, violent metropolis where the police department is as corrupt as the streets are deadly. In this movie, we follow three stories, the central of which involves Marv, a tough-as-nails and nearly indestructible street fighter who goes on a rampage of vengeance when he falls for a beautiful woman who is killed while lying in bed with him at her side.

Starring: Mickey Rourke, Bruce Willis, Benicio Del Toro, Clive Owen, Elijah Wood...
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez, Frank Miller
Produced by: Robert Rodriguez, Frank Miller, Elizabeth Avellan

Dhoom Boom boomed!!

2006-12-26T05:38:00.000-08:00

If you ask me, did I like Dhoom 2, well my answer would be ahem! NO. I did not.
I did like the kiss though, I did like the Bikes, the chase scenes, and Hrithik and Rio , but there was so much to dislike . From Strategic " in-your-face" Product placements [In the 90 minutes before the Interval, I counted ten: (1) the Sony screen in the police briefing room, (2) the Sony VAIO laptop Hrithik uses in Bombay, (3) a Coca Cola can on a desk, (4) the BURP! truck for the stakeout, (5) Sony monitors in the security room, (6) jewels of the Taj (hotels), (7) Winch 6000, (8) Cinemax cinemas, (9) Cars, the animated film, and (10) Sugar Free Natura. And I’m sure I’ve missed a few.], to the boring storyline of a very intelligent Thief on the Run, does it hit any lower.

So what if the movie boasts of better visuals, better song chodeography, better costumes, the movie still is just ....eh! I don't care to find a word. Couple of things haven't actually changed though since the first movie. Uday Chopra is still as irritating as Ali in the first movie , irrespective of the color of Bandana he wears,Pritam's music is yet again been inspired from a Middle East melody, and Coke is still the Official Drink of the movie. Life ho to Aisi!!

Cheers!!

Crapam Crap

2006-12-26T05:24:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe that this is the same team which made Hera Pheri.
I cannot believe that I went to see this movie.
I cannot believe that I survived after watching it.
I cannot believe that I did not puke even once.
I cannot believe that I am blogging on this crap by Priyadarshan.
An appeal to CBFC, can we please in the interest of National Security, ban Mr. Priyadarshan from shitting on the Celluloid with his undigested crap . Puhleeez!!!!

Magnum Opus : Casino Royale

2006-12-26T04:50:00.000-08:00

This is Bond...at its best. Doesn't matter if people kill me for saying this, because finally I get to see Bond using his license to kill. So even if critics or Bond fanatics may still go gaga about Sean Connery or Mr. Brosnan being the best Bond ever with their suavity and panache, Daniel Craig's rugged Bond portrayal leaves Ethan Hunt miles behind screaming for attention, and Jason Bourne seems like a wannabe. Right from the word go, it is out there. If you have come expecting a jaw dropping spectacular Opening Scene for a new introducing Bond( like Brosnan's unforgettable Bungee Jump in Golden Eye), well you might be disappointed with the opening 5 minutes of Black and White Rumble. If you are expecting over-the-top gadgets and "Listen Carefully Bond" Sessions from Q, this doesn't have that either. But the movie more than makes up for these two voids,or rather say 'Bond' voids. Because the movie doesn't need them , neither does Bond. If you are expecting Sultry Bond Girls in yellow bikinis, wake up. Eva Green isn't the normal skin show Bond Girl . She is the first Bond "Woman", if I may say so.

But then, with all things said and done,it all comes down to one thing and that is--Daniel Craig is the man. He doesn't have the raw star quality of Connery, but he's easily the best actor to have played the part. Add to that the gripping storyline. Craig is unlikeable but human and gradually picks up the Bond traits we know until he becomes more likable but just a little less human. It's an interesting journey and Craig is up to it. It's not just his delivery, it's also his body language. Even his fighting style changes as he adapts.The beauty about Daniel Craig is that he doesn't worry about being able to fit into the polished shoes of Brosnan and bring the sophistication of his predecessors. He does not even try to. And yet when we walk out of the theatre, we believe that Daniel Craig is James Bond. Right from the opening Act of the Brilliantly chodeographed Chase Scene in Madagascar to the Airport Explosion Scene, Casino Royale captivates you. But surprisingly, the most dramatic and exciting moments take place in relative stasis—around a poker table where the protagonists face off against each other, with millions of dollars and their very own reputations at stake , where the power of a piercing glance or the action of the gambling chip being placed on the table packs as much punch as that of a bullet from a silenced Beretta.

Casino Royale is a royal treat to the senses Its a must watch. See it to believe it.

P.S. Dhoom 2 releases next week, tch tch. Bad placement

Bye Bye Bye!!!

2006-09-13T04:44:00.000-07:00

I have my one leg up and my palm on my heart, begging for thy forgiveness for I have sinned to have watched Karan Johar's flick " KANK". If you don't happen to know what that is, I do not bother to write it down. First things first. Forty Plus Sharukh Khan, playing the role of Footballer Dev Saran in US--unbelievable, in a bad way.Him getting a 5 million dollar contract for his footer skills and a penalty kick-- unbelievable and disgusting. Let's get real. Next--Preity Zinta as Mrs.Rhea Saran,and Diva from Diva, America's No.1 Fashion Mag,--C'mon where has Vogue gone? And beleive me, these guys have all the chandeliers and chiffon, Marble Tiled Floors, Designer Wear,Manish Malhotra ChikkanKaari , ...Mr.Karan Johar could you please throw some light on the sorry plight of onsite working Engineers - India's largest exports. A totaly different and a bitter story altogether. Well, but then, you can say, no one goes to watch a Karan Johar flick expecting realistic details. He's got the bucks, so he'll flaunt.So be it.
Getting down to the crux, that is the story, I just cannot digest Mr.Khan's vibrating effect , I mean the way he delivers his lines. It seems too dramatic, too melodramatic rather. The jokes are cheap, very cheap and Mr.Bachhan , please oh please act your age. You are no De Niro or Pacino. And so Sexy Sam comes across as Sleazy Sam. Mr Junior Bachhan is cool as ever as the ideal husband who loves his wife a lot, but all he gets in return is his dissatisfied wife who is still looking for her love. The story - acclaimed as a Mature and Bold one,dealing with the Topic of Fidelity and Infidelity, is very wrongly treated. SRK and Rani's characters are too bad.Utterly bad, and suddenly they turn into good souls near the climax. Ok, if you still want to know the story, it is the story about these two unhappy married couples, SRK and Preity are married and have a son. But their marriage is nothing great. And so is Abhishek's and Rani's. All changes when SRK meets Rani all over again and falls in love.Rani reciprocates.All hell breaks loose when their respective partners get to know this. And then a staggered climax. The only plus points in the movie are Anil Mehta's impeccable cinematography, and Shankar Ehsaan Loy's score.

My Messages to the team:

Mr.Limping SRK, why are you so angry and shaky all the time. Do you spank your real son so much , and why are you against the violin?

Mr.Johar, there is life beyond chiffons, and cinema beyond Sharmishta Roy's art direction.

Miss Rani, please start enjoying parties and be a better wife than Maya is.

Preity , take care of your skin. You look old. The wrinkles are showing. Someone tell her of those cosmetics with Age-Defying Complex and Stuff.

Mr.Bachhan, stop playing ultra cool dadies , rolling their R's in perfect American accents, and sharing sleazy jokes with their sons.

Mrs. Kirron Kher, can't say much.

Junior Bachhan, you rock. But don't overdue the "ooh I am so sexy, cool dude, Hip-Hop" Thing.

My Rating--1.5 /5

Magnum Opus 6: Rang de Basanti

2006-02-08T03:55:00.000-08:00

Rang de Basanti (RDB)fills in me a feeling of Triumph, Euphoria, Sincerity, and Pain,Anguish and Heart Stirring Emotions all at the very same time.This is one movie which has left me stirred to the core. I am speechless, totaly.For those who haven't seen, it's high time to wake up, and buy your tickets. Now, I am no big movie critic.But in my venture of blogging reviews of movies I had started watching movies from the eye of the maker, eyeing details of the lenses of the filmmaker, hearing every sound, measuring every note. And then to me. RDB happened. This movie has thrown me back to those days when cinema was completely swallowed by my hungry feasting senses , without a burp.

As I said, I am clueless--Clueless whether I should marvel at the technical finesse and cinematic expertise of the brilliant story-telling , or do I wake up to the stirring story, the spirit of "Saffron".I do not have any clue where to start from. Rang de Basanti is by far, the most brave movie that has come across in our times, or perhaps in Indian Cinema. Rang de Basanti, is a triumph in all ways imaginable.This review is just not meant to be yet another review about yet another Bollywood movie .I feel, I am dwarfing it by limiting its span by terming it "Bollywood". It is so different from those patriotic genre movies we have seen up while we were growing up-the Manoj Kumar's school of patriotic cinema displaying jingoistic shades of the tricolor which at times seemed so unreal.Patriotism as in RDB, is very very subtle and very wonderfully weaved into the narrative.Okay, let's stop the "taarifon ke pool bandhna" for a while and get on with the review.Because I can just speak volumes about this movie, and how it has affected me, but well, getting back to the review part, lets get started..so Read On..!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As I started getting cozy in the theatre after the trailers, the reels start rolling, and a deep aamir Khan utters in the background-----
" Ab bhi Jo na Khola, Khoon Nahi Woh Paani Hai Desh Ke Kaam Main Jo Naa Aaya, Bekar Woh Jawaani Hai .." It struck a deep chord with me , that this is not yet another flick about happy-go-lucky guys and gals cracking non-veg jokes,drinking beer and doing just plain shit. The Story-----RDB starts with a Brit-independent film maker Sue(Alice Patten) stalking off her budget-hit job to India to make a film on the young revolutionaries who so impressed her grandfather, an angrezon ke zamaane ke jailor, with their calm in the face of imminent death.And next thing we know(not exactly, we get to hear Maa ki Aankh from a Brit's mouth) she is in the Delhi University, where her friend Sonia(Soha Ali Khan) arranges for her stay and also for the auditioning for the actors, to act in her Movie based on the lives of revolutionaries Azad, Bhagat Singh, Ashfaq-Ullah, and Rajguru et al, based upon the chronicles left by her grandfather--Genr. McKinley. The auditions start, and the worth-mentioning part is what we see next. A roll of laughter comes to us as we see students doing stuff like "Nanhe Munne Bacchhe tere Mutthhi main Kya hai" , "Kaliyon Ka Chaman", Nari Shakti Jaagran to "hip-hop Vande Mataram--Jana Gana Mana".Sue,depressed by the way things were turning out, starts feeling low, when Sonia takes to destress her out ...to the "Paathshala".

And there we go..we meet the effervescent...Mad Circle Gang...the beer drinking , debonair DJ(Aamir Khan) and Sukhi (Sharman Joshi), the filthy rich ,spoilt brat, chain smoker Karan( Siddharth) and the creatively inclined, poetic, handsome 6 feet something stud Aslam(Kunal Kapoor). And then Laxman(Atul Kulkarni) arrives...he is one of those guys whom we see with a tilak on the forehead and a saffron scarf, opposing the Western culture invading the Indians, specially the youth--Only difference between him and the others in his gang--He believes in the beliefs..
But, contrary to Sue's expectations, the youth have no feelings for their country. India is a no-hoper where corruption is rampant, and nothing can be done to salvage the situation, they believe. They even poke fun at Sue's attempts to make a film, till they come around.Sue looks with all surprised eyes,Delhi police being bribed and the way the India for which martyrs like Bhagat Singh and Azad had sacrificed their lives, has taken a shape of a gutter filled with the filth of corruption, 50 years after independence. We are exposed to this debate which we all have deep in our hearts somewhere.---Are we proud of our nation?And if we are, what are we proud of? Well of course, we have a deep rooted heritage of revolutionaries who fought against British colonialism to achieve Independence. But have things turned out the right way.

To this , we have a very strong reply from Sonia's fiance' Wing Cdr. Ajay Rathod(Madhavan) ---" Koi bhi desh perfect nahi hota, use behtar bana padta hai.."(No country is perfect, we gotta act to make it better and better).Sue pursues the guys to act in her documentary movie, and gets succesful in her pursuit. And then what we see is the blooming and grooming of the minds, the metamorphosis of a bunch of happy go luck kids of yuppiedom, and how they start waking up to the call of Saffron--the beliefs of Bhagat Singh and Azad.As they play the historical characters, their perspective about the present, and their own role in it, changes forever. Which, in a nutshell, is what the movie is about.But still , I wasn't sure where things were leading to at Intermission point.
Post Interval, in a tragic accident, Ajay dies rescuing a MIG fighter plane. All the nations an uproar on the issue, raising questions of corruption at Defence Ministry. The Defence Minister denies all charges and goes ahead saying that MIG flights are just fine, and they should not be allowed to be piloted by amateur pilots like Ajay. Things take a chaotic turn with Lathi-Charges and Violence on peaceful demonstrators at India Gate. All hell breaks loose, and then we see things rapidly happening---Defence Minister assasinated, Corrupt Arms dealer(Karan's father), killed by own son,..and then confession time at All India Radio. The climax just shook me and left me numb, out of words. I don't know how did I feel exactly when I walked out of the theatres, but I did get to hear the review from renowned lyricist Javed Akhtar...and this what he had to say...Khoye Huye Raahon par Barson se Nazar Nahi Gayee..Aaj Kisi ne Us Taraf..Mudke to Dekha (Its been ages since lost ways haven't been seen..Today, at least someone did see that way)...The closing lines before the closing credits started scrolling up will remain one of the most powerful lines of the movie, making an indelible impression on my mind--"I always believed that there were two kinds of men, One who go screaming to their death, and the other who go in silence......And then, I met the third kind."

The Specially Special Stuff...

There are moments where you just forget everything , and start reacting to the movie mentally--You take part actively in the debates,as if you were asking the questions. The special editing ..transitions from 21st century to the Raj Days..too good. Jalianwallah Bagh Massacre..General Dyer, The cinematography.. awesome.Perfect Colour settings,..Okay Fine..I need to heartfully thank the technical guys now...Binod Pradhan..the cinematographer..visual effects Supervisor Brynley Cadman for the amazing visuals..and of course Ronnie Screwvala to have produced the movie, last but not the least hats-off to Mr.Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra.

And now for the credits to the performances...
Truly, in a huge mulitstarrer cast like this, we do expect someone to get the lion's share and run away with the credits..especially when it is an Aamir Khan movie,But contrary to it, this movie belongs to the story..Three Cheers to the story first and then the performances...

Aamir Khan playing a character much younger than him, with his North Indian Haryanvi accent and dialects, (Behen-di-Takki) and pranks, and of course the Sue-kar Mere Dil ko song. But what strikes me the most, is the one scene when he breaks down saying "Sab Kuch bikhra hua hai..aur hum baithke Tamasha dekh rahain Hai"..(Everything is so scattered..and we are sitting down and watching the show) Aamir Khan..you still rock!!!
but as I said..its not Aamir alone..Siddharth of the Boys' fame delivers.He is really good, and the surprise package is Sharman Joshi. I never beleived in this guy that he could turn out so good. He is as natural as one could be. Atul Kulkarni , retains his status as a top-notch actor and well Kunal Kapoor..breathe of fresh air, the guy has got some attitude. Watch out Bollywood, this guy has got that something to be the next superstar, and even if he doesn't who cares, he is just brilliant.Kirron Kher speaks a million words with just her plain simple silence and just beautifully renders the character of Mittro, Punjabi widow worried about her only son Diljeet.

All in all, the cast...... too good. Of course, Aamir gets into the skin of the character and delivers a knockout performance from start to end, but the film has more gems when it comes to performances: Siddharth [excellent], Atul Kulkarni [fantastic], Soha Ali Khan [a complete revelation; efficient], Kunal Kapoor [natural] and Sharman Joshi [powerful]. Alice Patten is brilliant and besides delivering a flawless performance, her style of speaking Hindi is sure to win a lot of hearts. Madhavan is likeable. Waheeda Rehman is graceful as ever. Both Om Puri and Anupam Kher don’t get much scope. Kiron Kher is exceptional yet again. Mohan Agashe, Steven Mckintosh, K.K. Raina and Lekh Tandon are adequate.

Special thanks to Prasoon Joshi for the very very intense and uplifting heart-wrenching lyrics..especially the title track, Roobaroo and Lukka Chuppi. Dialogues..too good.

Music..AR Rahman,,,who says you are done...
I felt Lukka Chuppi was the best song of the movie...

Now that is a personal opinion, because the way the lyrics flow and the way it was picturised just etched a deep mark on my heart. Khalballi installs in you a deep Arabic Influence with its Awesome Sound..

Roobaroo is very catchy..the lyrics just make me feel so happy...

aye saala.... abhi abhi... huaa yaqeen ...

ki aag hai ...mujh mein kahi............. hui subaah... main chal gaya .........suraj ko main ...nigal gaya..... Ruu-ba-ruu roshni heyy

and Paathshala is so very much a Headbangers Ball.

As for the title track, Rang de Basanti, Daler Paaji just simply rocks..No questions asked.

thodisi dhuul meri dharti ki mere watan ki .. .thodisi Khushbuu baurai se mast pavan ki ...thodisi dhondhane waali dhak-dhak dhak-dhak dhak-dhak saansein... jin mein ho junoon junoon voh boonde laal lahuu ki ...yeh sab tuu mila mila le... phir rang tuu khila khila le ... aur mohe tuu rang de basanti yaara mohe tuu rang de basanti .

BEAUTIFUL...!!!!~~~~~~~

So at the end of the day, it doesn't matter to me if Rang de Basanti goes ahead and rewrite Bollywood history by becoming a box-office hit, or it just pulls to be a success. What matters to me, is that it is the one movie which has made me think and think over and over again..and the one thing I hear at the end of it is Tagore's lines
"Into the Heaven of Freedom My Father, Let My Country Awake..."

Magnum Opus 5: King Kong..the name sez it all

2005-12-26T22:59:00.000-08:00

It just can't get monstrous than this. This is it. The most ultimate monster movie there is , and I guess there will be ever, until and unless we have our genetic engineers creating a live King Kong who experiences the same emotions of love, anger, and pain and also is as strong enough to rip off the jaw of a T-Rex. Enough said, Peter Jackson is one of the (if not the) greatest directors of our times. Well, people do believe that whatever his ventures are, his work will always be shadowed by the LOTR trilogy. But , in King Kong, we see the imagination and the boyish fantasy of a true King Kong fan getting wings and flying high, unleashing his own vision and shades to the 1933 classic starring Fay Wray.The boy here is, director Peter Jackson.After his Lord of the Rings trilogy earned a zillion dollars, a slew of Oscars, and a place at the tip top of the Hollywood pyramid, Jackson was able to write his own ticket. As his follow-up project, Jackson chose to remake King Kong, which had industry observers scratching their heads.Historically, sequels and remakes of the original Kong ranged from bad to unwatchable, and while Jackson certainly knows effects and storytelling, Kong remakes seem to be cursed endeavors. Voodoo or no, they're probably ill-advised. 1933's Kong is one of those movie archetypes that really shouldn't be messed with.
King Kong simply isn't meant to be trifled with. Alas, some will try.With this update, Jackson has the best of intentions and the utmost reverence for the source material. The movie is chock full of homages to the original, from the opening title design to snippets of dialogue used to a scene with giant bugs that was partially shot and cut from the 1933 version. In fact, Jackson's devotion to the original is fawning to the point of obsequiousness, with one noteworthy exception: His version of the film is nearly twice as long. It runs for 187 minutes according to IMDB, but who cares.You just get so much immersed into the movie so deeply, you just do not have any track of time. From the moment the reels begin to roll, you are there, 1930s New York, depression era..people unemployed and starving, the rich getting richer and poor, poorer with no space for the middle class. The depiction of Manhattan is truly a masterpiece, the cinematography--impeccable.The movie is brilliantly divided into three basic constituents( if you may say so) -- New York and the main character build up, Skull Island, and Kong in the city.

The first part encircles around the characters and how they come together to this venture of a lifetime. Jack Black plays obsessive film maker Carl Denham who is passionate about making a movie in the locales of the far East. He gets hold of a map, which he beleives will lead to his Neverland, only that this place is actually Never-go-there-Land. Having trouble with financers , studio people and distributors Denham decides to do it on his own.We are then introduced to out of work ,theatre actress ,Ann Farrow who is trying hard to make ends meet.Denham convinces her to play the role of the actress in his movie. Naomi Watts in this immortal character of Ann Farrow is more than what you would have expected. Simply ethereal. You also come across other characters such as Kyle Chandler as Bruce Baxter, the actor , and of course Adrien Brody as scriptwriter Jack Driscoll.Other characters you see revolving around the storyline are Jimmy played by Jamie Bell of Billy Elliot fame, Preston , Denham's assistant and Captain Englehorn. Denham tricks everyone and has a narrow escape himself to set off for his journey to Skull Island ignorant of the things to come.

Eventually we arrive at Skull Island, only to be greeted by spear-wielding natives (their faces jabbed full of leftover prop piercings from Jackson's LOTR orc army) .Skull Island itself seems so scary with its foggy shoreline,jungle edge to the seaside,massive retaining wall around island, and hell like living place of the native tribe, a race of people dentally challenged covered with dirt,skulls and blood ,who promptly kidnap Ann as a sacrifice to the great ape . What you see next is simply Jaw-dropping,heart-stopping, eye-popping action sequences non-stop . Just fasten your seat belts because what you experience is nothing less than a roller-coaster ride. You just have more and more creatures invading the screen and making your adrenaline rush like you are on the driver seat of a formula-1 Ferrari taking your fastest lap at NASSCAR. The dinosaur stampedes featuring brontosauruses and little dinosauruses is simply breath-taking( not in a good way) and then you see more of it and more and more, until you start just want it to finish, but hey there's some more.We have King Kong raging against the search party, out to rescue Ann. Kong vs. the three T-Rexes is just brilliant.I am falling short of words here. The search party being bugged by some really disgusting bugs, or whatever is at its grossiest best, or worst for that matter. Amidst all this, we also get to see some original piece of Peter Jackson with Ann trying to connect to the ape, with all sorts of funny tricks and we get to know the lighter, vegetarian side of King Kong and who has a starnge sense of humour. The movie scores highly on this. The relation that Ann shares with the ape is brilliantly conveyed throught the lens of Peter Jackson and Naomi Watts' 1000 watt glittering eyes, and more than that Andy Serkis' CG portrayal of the 25 feet ape.

Denham , being the obsessed filmmaker he is, just doesn't give up even when members of his crew die and his cameras and reels are destroyed. He now instead plans to capture the beast and show it to the world. and so then , the tussle between the ape and the crew.And when Kong is displayed at Broadway as the 8th wonder of the world, he isn't happy about it. All hell breaks loose when he breaks the shackles and the beast is all let loose on the streets of Manhattan. Ann finds him, and you have a really touching scene of Kong with Ann, sliding on the ice rink. And before you get cozy, we have the US army hunting him down.The ape now takes the Empire State Building as his retreat, not until he is again hunted down by Airplanes, and he falls to his death. This entire episode on the Empire State Building is filled with so high emotions and sentiments seen in the eyes of both Kong and Ann. Peter Jackson has definitely been able to capture the essence of the story, which despite being a monster-movie filled with huge action scenes and special effects, at heart is a story of a Beast falling for Beauty. Give the man an Oscar again.

Special Credits:

The entire crew-- Cinematographer Andrew Lesnie to have given so many breath taking views of 1930s vintage New York , spell bounding natural wild side of Skull Island as well as its scary face,Production Designer Grant Major to have created New York of the 1930s down to last inch perfectly, editor Jamie Selkirk for the crispy action sequences, Make-up man Richard Taylor, this movie goes into your resume as your best freak show, Joe Letteri and his team of Special Effects, I won't say a word because you people have left me speechless.Of course, Academy Award winner pair of scriptwriters Fran Walsh and Phillipa Boyens.
The only downside of the crew is the BackGround score by James Newton Howard. I don't have any clue why Peter Jackson opted for him, even when Howard Shore scored so brilliantly for his LOTR movies, and even won the Oscars for it. I believe Howard Shore had a guest role in the movie as the symphony conductor at the Broadway scene when Kong is 'premiered' for the first time.The score is good, but just not very outstanding, like it should have been, like the other ingriedents of the movie.

Adrian Brody--as the 1930s playwright Jack Driscoll, he is out and out the man. Friend to the weird filmmaker Denham, and the man who falls in love with Ann. Thought the character is not dealt much in detail, but hey they couldn't have done more . After all, its a story about the Beauty and the Beast.

Jack Black--as Carl Denham, greedy, ambitious, never gonna stop attitude.You see it all come to life in his performance.Brilliant.The man has come a long way from his Tenacious D movies and musical comedy days. From School of Rock to King Kong, one Monster Leap.

Naomi Watts--as Ann Farrow, one of the most immortal characters of cinema, it definitely takes a lot out of ya to even bag such a role. I simply loved the way she brought back the good old classics by the way she portrayed herself, the way she moved and talked, and how she expectedly imitated the way actresses a few decades ago would act in front of the camera: too modest looking, too disciplined, too gentle, and too fluid. She was natural. No wonder, Kong fell for her..hehhe She is absolutely stunning.

Andy Serkis--as the Beast, King Kong. I wish he should have won the Best Actor in a Supporting Role as the Gollum in LOTR. He does it again, giving life this time to the 25 feet beast King Kong.I can't say anything against this, even if I wish to. Just go see it, if you haven't. Trust me, its more than worth every penny of what you spend on the ticket.

Bow to the Man: Peter Jackson
If it had been announced that a remake of the classic "King Kong" was being made without the name Peter Jackson attached to it, there is no doubt audiences would have been outraged. But after the enormous success of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, it would seem that the general public has learned to trust director Peter Jackson. After watching his remake of King Kong, I would have to say that their trust was well placed.
Jackson now firmly cements his name as a master filmmaker, the kind that all aspiring directors want to be. The attention he pays to the most minute details, the sheer class he shows in terms of production and scale, the amount of skill he has in manipulating our fragile emotions... the man is clearly one of the most talented directors in film history. And Jackson certainly brings his considerable skill and flair to show here in 'Kong'. While a different director likely would have speed up the story to the crew's arrival on Skull Island, Jackson takes his time with a nice, leisurely build up to their arrival, giving us lots of time to really get to know these characters, and also providing time for a slow and genuine romance building between the characters of Anne and Jack. This romance does lead to the very few and seldom weaknesses of the film... the romance scenes can seem a bit cheesy and contrived at times. But when that's literally the only complain I can make, it's a pretty damn good sign for the movie!And Jackson seems to have an almost uncanny skill in manipulating his audience's emotions - you will cheer, you will laugh, you will cry, you will really be on the edge of your seat and you will be truly and thoroughly disgusted in at least one part of the movie - watch out for a cave full of giant insects on Skull Island.

Last Words:
So we have the best of both worlds--the touching emotional scenes as well as the beasty, thrilling action coming live with hair-curling special effects. Peter Jackson's King Kong is the most definitive King Kong movie ever made.Though I haven't seen the 1933 original, only the 1976 version and also glimpses of the unforgettable 1986 sequel, Peter should be very happy and also proud of himself to have achieved what he had wanted at the very first place, not to outperform the original or spoof it, but to pay a sincere tribute to yesteryear's cinema in a glorious way, by not ending up just being an XBox 360 version of something on an Atari, better visuals and special effects, nothing more. Peter Jackson's King Kong is way much more. It doesn't matter if you compare it to the original or not. It bothers to some that the movie has grown to a size twice the original, that it feels like Peter Jackson adapted a 600 page novel rather than a 100 minute movie. For me,personally I would not like anything deleted from the movie. Its just so perfect. I'm still dumbstruck. Kong's awesome. Kong rules. Bravo, Peter Jackson, bravo ..!!!!!!!
To conclude, I qoute Carl Denham's last words in the movie: " No, It is not the airplanes, but Beauty which killed the Beast "..Rarely are our emotions manipulated with such ease, rarely do we find ourselves getting so engrossed in a story that a 3 hour running time seems to have gone by far too quickly and we yearn for more. King Kong is an odyssey of a movie, and the most genuine and compelling output seen since... well, the Lord of the Rings. This is classic storytelling at its peak - don't miss out on it!
Now come on..you should not be reading my blog just to get educated whether you really want to see King Kong.............

Magnum Opus 4: Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi

2005-12-09T03:46:00.000-08:00

It begins: "'Long years ago we made a tryst with destiny, and now the time comes when we shall redeem our pledge, not wholly or in full measure, but very substantially. At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will awake to life and freedom.."..Pt.Nehru's famous speech on the eve of India's Independence.The scrolling words after Pt.Nehru's famous independent speech of tryst with destiny, revealing the mistake in the speech that , at the stroke of the midnight hour when the whole world was not actually not asleep, it was afternoon in New York.Never really gave it a thought , but its true.
It shows how the youth of India percieved India's independence way beyond just the win of freedom struggle from the British. We want freedom from the bad, tyrraneous system that exists.We want freedom from oppression. We want freedom of speech, freedom to live irrespective of our sex, religion, caste, creed or colour.
Have we got it? It is still a question unanswered even when India has entered the 21st century.We still have people unreached with justice, freedom and independence.So, is this cry for independence just going to remain a khwaish, one among those very thousands..which remains suppressed within us?
As the reels start rolling after the scrolling words from the narrator, we are left exposed to the jaw dropping visuals of that Summer of 69, where no one wishes to go..the corpses lying around like rotten leaves fallen from the trees, the living, no better than the corpses..all deaf, dumb to the inhuman bloodshed.The opening scene of Sudhir Mishra's "Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi" strikes you right at your core so hard, that you fall dumb and really feel the noise in that silent few minutes of the beginning.

Sudhir Mishra's Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi reflects the intensity and fate of three young characters, who start out on the same platform but choose different journeys and reach a destination of their own making. It could be the story of three ordinary, or not so ordinary, people, depending on the given circumstances, if the setting of this drama wasn't such a crucial time in history.
The late 1960s and early 1970s were turbulent times -- angst filled and revolutionary. It was the time of Vietnam, of flower power, of the Emergency and the rise of the Naxal movement in India. And a booming population of restless youth was eager to wage war against anything that curbed idealism. Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi digs into a section of this crazy chapter of history through its three protagonists – Siddharth Tyabji (Kaykay Menon), Geeta Rao (Chitrangada Singh) and Vikram Malhotra(Shiny Ahuja).

Synopsis:
Sidhharth is an idealist. Born to a Muslim lawyer father and a Hindu mother and believes in Marxism.The story traces Siddharth's journey from Marxist jargon to the Maoist (Naxalite) rebellion. His emotional attachment to Geeta does not stop him from his political pursuits.
Post-college, Geeta is married to an IAS officer but she continues to see Siddharth on the sly.
Vikram too has always nursed unconditional love in his heart for Geeta. But that's all there is to his soft side. A small town boy once, Vikram climbs the social ladder by networking in the big league unabashedly.
Geeta ends her marriage and starts living in the village with Siddharth. This is the time in the film when Geeta's character evolves. From a London-bred girl to teaching village women, or having a child out of wedlock or asking favours from Vikram in hours of need to a lot of other gruesome realities, Geeta discovers herself.
The story movies on. The characters mature and move on. They regret. They apologise. They change. Their lives are not the same.
Hazaaron Khwaishen Aisi plays like a novel spanning a decade. While Geeta is a picture of poignancy and inspires awe, Vikram's complexities leave the viewer perturbed. There is a lot to his greyness that is unsaid and yet subtly hinted through mere expressions. He is the most mysterious of them all.

The real thing:
If you've ever wondered why our nation is in such a mess, "Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi" attempts to tell you where we could have gone wrong. Mishra's most complex, ambitious film to date, "Hazaaron..." knits the major political upheavals between 1969 and 1977 into a love triangle, as he minces no words in castigating the Nehruvian "ideals" that modern India adopted as its model for governance.
Death, says one song in this remarkably dense and evocative film, is akin to love. And Vikram (Shiney Ahuja) sees death every time Geeta (Chitrangda Rao) looks at her idol-lover, the protagonist, Sidharth (Kay Kay Menon). The story weaves so beautifully the politically unstable Delhi and Calcutta of that era, and also brings out the chaotic Bhojpur District of Bihar.
The climax, should not disclose it, for the sake of the film-maker. You just have to watch it, if you haven't. And well I am going to watch it again today.

The ups:
Definitely , first of all: Kay Kay Menon, man he's so very good. Shiney Ahuja as the materialistic loser Vikram Malhotra..awesome performance. Chitrangada Singh, don't know if she does look like Smita Patil. But I do know one thing, she is one good actress. As Geeta Rao, the Uk return, Bhojpur settled struggler, she just leaves an indelible impression on your mind.
Sudhir Mishra's narrative, Shantanu Mopitra's brilliant score..Mann ye Bawra, and Bawra Mann, both surround the movie so brilliantly.

The downs:
I don't know why, but the movie set in the 1970s seemed so much bright to me. The colours and the entire setup of the movie did not seem quite 70s. Apart from that, the movie is a winner, by all means.

Last comments:
All the three protagonists seem to have understood the politics of Mishra's layered cinema, as he goes about making no bones about his contempt and cynicism for Nehruvian idealism.
This film lashes out at the Congress 'role-model' of governance almost to the point of denouncing and demolishing all that the architects of modern India dreamt of.

As a nation, where did we fail?Where did our leaders fall short? It offers no solutions, but makes you sit up and think.A lot of what you will see in "Hazaar..." will seem unreal and bizarre. But there is no exaggeration - it simply presents the politics we've been gifted with by the architects of Indian democracy

Magnum Opus 3:Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire..Too much left to be desired

2005-11-27T23:10:00.000-08:00

The first words when I walked out of the theatre is"Umm..that was ok.The movie wasn't bad eh! Hermione is very awesome(read beautiful), the effects are better, more real and all over the movie,the story is good,more mature, but come on why do I find Azkaban(Prisoner of Azkaban)more gripping. " I just cannot say it was a breath-taking movie experience as its predecessor. And then, they just seem so much more growing into my psyche, and definitely not in a positive way.The more I think about it, I find so many more flaws.

Okey Dokey, First things first.B'fore I had seen the movie, my friends(who had seen it, and also read the novel ) told me that they had skipped the entire Quidditch World Cup, which spans for some hundred pages in the book which speaks how vividly desriptive the event was in the book.That disturbed me a lot, and yeah probably was the key-factor in the ruining of the entire experience.Well, yes I am no big Harry Potter fan , and I admit that I haven't read any of the books.But yes, when it comes to the movies, I have watched them all.And I found this movie to be just another movie with extravagantly spent quids on special effects, and may be ignoring some technicalities on the narration. The movie just seemed to be so draggy in its narrative, may be because it didn't start for me on a right note.

Well FYI, this is the first time, the movie has been directed by a Britsh Director, and you definitely get to fell a strong British influence in the ambience of the movie, in things which can be fet during the movie and not one's that can be put into words.Confession time again: the first two Harry Potter movies , with all the young kids with Wixard and Witches robes on, or do I call them Wizard "Bling" ,left me cold.Whatever magic author J.K. Rowling worked on the page evaporated onscreen. Things improved last year with The Prisoner of Azkaban. Alfonso Cuaron, the Mexican director of the erotic road movie Y Tu Mama Tambien, let Harry (Daniel Radcliffe), Hermione (Emma Watson) and Ron (Rupert Grint) show evidence of hormones in their third term at Hogwarts. Now director Mike Newell (Four Weddings and a Funeral), the first Brit to direct the Brit franchise, makes further advances. Within limits, of course. Screenwriter Steve Kloves, ever faithful to Rowling, doesn't mess with overt sex.

And if you think, I have been quite harsh with this review, well I can also name some moments that I enjoyed.Say, the very excitinf TriWizard Championship.Yeah, but the tasks, I found not quite that gripping.The one thing which I can say let me glued to my seats was of course "You know who".
According to the book, dark evil Lord, Lord Voldemort, doesn't come alive until this story and remains as a ghost for so long.There had been speculations regarding the role of the dark lord being offered to other Brit actors, including Mr.Bean, Rowan Atkinson.But , the role comes out to its scariest best in Ralph Fiennes, who does his Red Dragon stare yet again, well except for the nose this time, which i am afraid, doesn't exist.
I loved the action set pieces in this movie...the Dragon challenge was exceptional, and the underwater sequences were perfect, but the maze... (oh the horror)... what was Mike Newell thinking? It could have been so much scarier. The beasts and creatures that challenge Harry and the others....missing. You can argue that the Director stayed on course and kept the story tight, but this is the final challenge to the tournament and it felt like it was over in 5 minutes. No drama, no feeling of danger.
At the end of it all, you don't really come out feeling excited about the whole movie, well I didn't.Let me say that I fully understand that it was pretty much impossible to fit a 700+ page book into a movie. But, did they have to chop up and rearrange everything??? I guess it would have been better for me, if I had rushed to it on the DVD release whenever it did.I was hoping for something fantastic, even memorable. Book 4 is where the series really takes off, with the characters getting lifted up to their teen maturity levels and of course,Lord Voldemort appearing. However the movie leaves a lot to be desired.
And to make the long story short(as the makers did), it ain't a great movie . JK dear, how did you approve the script?This effort does not bode well for the remaining books. Are they going to ruin Order of the Phoenix too.Ralph , I am counting on you to uplift the next.Warner Bros, needs to stop while they're ahead, because if they are going to release trash like this, then they are doing a gross diservice to JK and the rest of Potter-dom.

Magnum Opus 2: The Matrix,.. Can I ever get enuff of it?

2005-11-22T05:10:00.000-08:00

" Unfortunately , no one can be told what the matrix is, you have to see it for yourself".
How many times have I uttered those lines, since the movie , The Matrix, hit theatre screens worldwide in 1999? Haven' counted it though, but surely some thousand times ,if not more , and its not only me, its people my age, younger or elder to me who have uttered those lines, in different parts of the world in German, Thai, French, Japanese and what not.
The point is , we are the generation of the Matrix.And you love it, you hate it, but you cannot just have enough of it, no matter what.
There are a zillion of websites in millions of languages dedicated to the Matrix, showing how huge this movie has deeply made an indelible impression in our lives and in the way we watch and experience cinema.Do you think this yet another blog on the movie makes any sense? Who cares? I don't. Its just a ventilation of my emotions attached to the movie and everything that's related to it.
So,in the words of Cypher"..fasten your seat-belts Dorothy, coz Kansus is going bye-bye" and get ready to enter the world of the Matrix...

Magnum Opus 1: Parineeta..the married woman

2005-11-17T03:48:00.000-08:00

Each and every frame of this movie is a painting which is worth selling a hundred million dollars each..u think I am exaggerating ,read on ..and I say you'll be a changed man/woman once you are done with this..
Parineeta...a tale of love, a tale of two true lovers Shekhar and Lolita, caught in the web of misunderstndings, suspicion..and winning over them..
I take this oppurtunity to write my blog on it..Because it was my movie fav of this year 2k5..because it deserved more than Paheli to go to the Oscars as India's official entry..because it showcases Saif Ali Khan at his career's best performance (arguably after Dil Chahta Hai), because it has given birth to a wonderful actress Vidya Balan..and because it takes a producer like Vidhu Vinod Chopra to believe in an ad-person Pradeep Sarkar to direct this pure magic set in the backdrop of 1960's Calcutta.
The first thing you notice about Pradeep Sarkar's portrayal of this classic Sarat Chandra's novel is the tone, the hue and the flavour of 1960's Calcutta that he brings forth with extraordinary expertise.Right when you have just settled down with your popcorn in your seats, and the title credits have started rolling in, you get immersed in the aura of 1960's Calcutta as Amitabh Bachhan narrates the lyrical description of that era....of Calcutta's "Coffee House Addas" ..of the land of football frenzy people with "Aamar Shonar Bangla" playing in the background as the 'majhi' sails over the Hoogly river..of the political aspirations of Calcutta..of the love of Shekhar and Lolita...the city plays the ethereal backdrop for the tender story to unfold..and thus Sarath Chandra's prose takes the shape of lyrical poetry in the celluloid frames of Vidhu Vinod Chopra's Parineeta...the married woman

The story... unfolds in flashback... a young orphaned girl Lolita(Vidya Balan) is sent to live with her Uncle, and as destiny has it, she meets Shekhar(Saif Ali Khan), budding musician and son of a millionaire..both share their happy and bitter moments of childhood and adolescence and as they grow together it all takes the shape of intense love ..probably unknowingly..it is all so beautifully depicted in scenes where Lolita becomes jealous when she hears of Gayatri's (Diya Mirzaa) dressing style praised by Shekhar...also Shekhar's envy at Lolita spending evenings with Girish(Sanjay Dutt) all indicate the blooming of intense love between the two..It takes the arrival of Girish(the outsider) to realise each other's feelings.
The relationship between the two goes through a maze of greed, deception,misunderstandings and suspicion..but comes through all this to conquer over all these obstacles and displays the victory of true love over all .

The music...is pure magic and I cannot find any other synonym for it.Its simply spectacular and extra-ordinary.Music scored by Shantanu Moitra is actually the Trump Card of the movie.Each and every note has been woven so beautifully with the movie that you cannot imagine Parineeta the movie, without the songs, and each song in itself is a movie having a story to tell.
So,lets deal with them one by one, shall we.

Soona Man ka Aangan..Sonu Nigam does it again with this number, reflecting the deep pain and misery of Shekhar as he remembers his love Lolita. Shantanu blends perfectly Tagore's "Phulle Phulle" with immense expertise into this one..

Piyu Bole..The track audience will be humming when they alk out of the theatre, brilliant Bengali influences being mingled with the Elvis-loving character Shekhar who plays the notes on his piano..Shreya Ghosal's youthful, fresh and effervescent voice gives life to the song, and yes I would definitely not forget Sonu Nigam. The man is a genius, sheer genius.

Kasto Mazza(Ye Hawayein)This song features on Darjeeling's famous toy train, and gives the true feeling of a train song,not like the traditional "Mere Sapnon ki Rani".Should I say even better..Needless to say, Sonu Nigam and Shreya Ghoshal render the song perfectly..I can't imagine the song to have sung by any other singers..lyrics by (not much known )Swanand Kirkire are a treat to the ears..but the show-stealer is the chorus of children singing the Nepali verses "Kasto Mazza hai Rail ei maa..Ramailo Ukaali Orali".

Kaisi Paheli (hai Zindagaani.).Rekha sizzles completely and has her screen presence felt after a long time in this song, which mingles 60's Blues and Jazz music.The song appears when Girish and his family members go to this Calcutta Night Club called Moulin Rouge.Sung by the intoxicating Sunidhi Chauhan, the song displays the versatility of Shantanu Moitra.This song has it all, saxaphones, acustics riffing, and the ooh's of Blues.

Raat Hamari Toh..the song depicts the story of a dark night ..The song steals all your concentration and is a tale by itself..Listen to the this if you are all alone and you will feel the mood of the song touching you literally..Sung by Chitra, and Swanan who does a Ustad Sultan Khan..this is definitely not a forgettble song..

The song not mentioned so far is the wedding song, which I think was meant for easing the starting credits rolling procedure. I personally feel the song to be one of the two let-downs of the movie.

The Performances..
Saif Ali Khan..to begin with, has come a long way from just being the Junior Nawab or the son of Sharmila tagore, to this great actor who is a strong contender for next year's Film Awards, and not only the Filmfares and Screens,but also the National Awards(c'mon if he can do it with Hum Tum, he can definitely win it for Parineeta).Saif comes truly alive as the guitar loving, Elvis fan,cigarette smoking and Lolita loving Shekhar..absolutely brilliant is what I say...

Vidya Balan..she is a mallu(Malayalam) is what I was told when I googled for her origins and I was taken by complete shock,..Come on..she looks so very bengali with the Sindoor, and Laal-paai Saaree..She plays the title role of Lolita brilliantly(I am running out of words)..that's it..plain and simple, she was brilliant.Give her all the awards you have.

Sanjay Dutt..he plays Girish the stranger, outsider..its actually (I think}, a take on today's Lakshmi Mittal, the steel tycoon. Girish is the man who comes to Lolita's rescue during her bad times.Nothing much revealed though about the character.He ends up marrying the bubbly Koel(Raima Sen),Lolita's friend.Not a very challenging role for Sanju Baba though, he plays it with ease.Raima sen as Koel is very brief, but has her moments in the movie.Obviously, you cannot detail each and every character. But definitely didn't see much of Raima Sen.

Other characters that you will remember are...

Gayatri Tatiya..Diya Mirza in a very brief performance of a rich girl as Shekhar's fiance'
Nabin Roy..Veteran Bengali actor Sabyasachi Chakravarthy plays the role of the greedy and bad businessman father of Shekhar
Gurucharan..played by Veteran Television actor Achyut Poddar, this is the character of Lolita's uncle, who along with his wife are Lolita's only guardians
Shekhar' mother..they never revealed her name, but the role is played by yesteryear's Punjabi actress Surinder Kaur
Also Ninad Kamat plays Shekhar's friend who is a music arranger..

The let downs..
Parineeta is no doubt a huge canvas,painted so beautifully but it has a minute portion where the brush strokes are disturbing rather than being beautiful, one I have already mentioned and that is the Wedding song(cmon, do you have Dholak and stuff happening in a Bengali Wedding, and where was the wedding happening, Shekhar's home or Gayatri's home????), and the other one is the Climax scene where the emotions of friends and family(except for shekhar's father) rise to encourage Shekhar to break the wall..too melodramatic and comes out of the film and makes me choke..come on, you were making this very beautiful movie, what happened suddenly?But you can definitely ignore this and go back home happy when Shekhar and Lolita reunite. ..for ever

Special Credits to the..
Research team ..to have depicted 1960's Calcutta perfectly to the last inch, The movie lives Bengal and breathes Calcutta .

Art Direction..Nitin Desai,Keshto Mandal,Pradeep and Tanushree Sarkar,..Nitin Desai ...he's the same guy who did the art direction for Sanjay Leela Bhansali's "Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam" and "Devdas", thank you for realistically depicting the sets, of a Bengali Zamindaar and not making them span to acres of fountains and a huge race-course as a court yard(remember Devdas)

Lights Deptt..Nights have never been so beautiful, each frame of Parineeta's night scenes (I don't know how many times I have used this)is a painting..a masterpiece, and it all stands out and blends so easily into the movie because of the Lights deptt, with all the effects of Candles,Smoke and Darkness..man , ..Darkness never felt so silky
Cinematographer :Nataraja.N.Subramaniam..if Pradeep Sarkar was the painter, he definitely drew the sketches for them..
the scenes of Hoogly,Durga Pooja,Victoria Memorial,Howrah,Darjeeling,..man I can't stop listing them..
Costumes..Subarna Ray Chaudhri..plain and simple brilliant, especially for Diya Mirza's wardrobe when Gayatri and Shekhar watch a derby, and Rekha's attire for the Moulin Rouge scene...
Of course the Editor..Hemanti Sarkar to have kept the movie so crisp..
And last but not least..the trio..
Vidhu Vinod Chopra, Pradeep Sarkar and Shantanu Moitra..

need I say more..

Last words..Parineeta belongs at last to Vidya Balan definitely.But Rekha in her just over 4 minutes performance in Kaisi Paheli Zindagaani leaves us spell-bound.she's still enchanting.
Well enough said and written,now do you feel good?And for those who haven't seen the movie as yet, I should say get up you lazy bums, buy ,borrow or steal the DVD of Parineeta and watch it..Experience the magic of Parineeta and be enthralled by it.Because the world is now divided into two parts, first belonging to those lucky ones who have seen Parineeta, and the other to those who are unfortunate enough to have not seen it.